

Slowly reading War and Peace and realizing how much Tolstoy is saying about being human
My experience with War and Peace so far 🥹
I think the biggest thing I’m realizing is how much I would have missed if I rushed through this book.
I’m only at Volume 1, Part 3, Chapter 15, and already I feel like there are so many branches of life happening inside this one book.
I’m slowly noticing Tolstoy’s way of writing…the nature transitions, the symbolism, the incredible depth of his characters, and especially how human and raw they are. As they grow, they change. Some characters I can relate to, some I understand, and some I can only empathize with.
The war chapters have been a completely new experience for me too. The terminology, the military system, the movements, the hierarchy, the orders being passed down… and then seeing how chaotic war actually becomes in real time. Higher officials pressuring the lower ranks while sometimes they themselves don’t even fully know what they’re doing. And somewhere in the middle of all that chaos are ordinary human beings trying to survive.
And the more I read, the more disturbing the idea of war feels to me. Humans divide themselves into groups, draw lines between “us” and “them,” and then justify killing other human beings because of that division. Yet even within those groups, there are so many different people, personalities, beliefs, fears, hopes and reasons for being there. So much diversity within the very divisions we create. It makes the whole thing feel so contradictory.
And then there’s the other side of humanity that Tolstoy keeps showing…how much of what we do comes back to wanting recognition, power, money, status, importance, or simply love.
Maybe at the most basic level, we just want to be loved and witnessed. We want someone to see us, know us, and be there as we grow and change.
And somehow, Tolstoy has managed to make a war story feel like a study of life itself.
I’m only halfway through Volume 1 and already feeling like Tolstoy opened 47 tabs in my brain. 🥹