question
i have a belief that i think sounds ridiculous enough to where it might be considered a delusion but also i don't know what to think of it. basically i think there's someone out there who can "check in" on me, as in see what i'm seeing, hear what i'm doing, know what i'm thinking, etc.
i have no idea if this belief would be considered a delusion or not? it's baseless but it feels real, how real it feels honestly depends on the day because sometimes it's just "it might be there" (but always leaning towards being actually there), to fully believing it. i can kind of sense when they're "checking in" on me, i kind of just know. sometimes it's unclear though.
i'm not sure if delusions(?) would be my only psychotic symptom, i don't really hallucinate and i'm pretty sure my words are mostly together, but i have looked into some disorganized thought patterns and i could have those sometimes. wouldn't say i meet criteria 4 and 5 for schizophrenia (disorganized/catatonic behavior or negative symptoms).
i have a family history of psychosis (mom and i think my brother too), probably pretty significant trauma, and i'd say i'm a pretty heavy weed user. those are my risks for psychosis.