Dear pirates.

The wizard council has authorized the use of nukes. For those who don't know what nukes are, imagine an entire powder keg filled with gunpowder, but 100 times bigger.

We will be aiming at your military centers, including ports and coves, while trying to avoid civilians. But I have enough of them to bomb each and every one of your ships.

This **will** be devastating. If it is not enough to get your surrender, we **will** use even more destructive means.

As the person tasked to drop the nukes, I still hope for peace. That's why I'm offering you two more days to accept peace. We are not asking for an unconditional surrender, just for those hostilities to end once and for all.

Please accept this offer.

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"...Okay, the situation got out of hand here and I, like a few from our realm r/wizardposting , believe that nuclear annihilation is an unreasonable ultimatum and response. So any pirate who is willing to end this conflict peacefully, please present your terms for a negotiated peace and let's...well negotiate a peace, or just an agreement to end hostilities"

To the captains, crews, smugglers, rogues, freebooters, opportunists, and assorted troublemakers of r/PiratePosting,

The Coalition of European Powers wishes to make its position clear.

The war is over.

Well.

Mostly.

The Royal Navy and the Marine Nationale have no immediate intention of pursuing the pirate fleets back to Tortuga, raiding every cove, hunting every captain, or spending the next several years chasing suspicious-looking sloops across half the known world.

Not because we have suddenly developed a fondness for piracy.

We have not.

Nor because we have forgotten the attacks upon merchant shipping.

We have not.

Nor because we have somehow concluded that pirates are respectable members of society.

That would be absurd.

Rather, we have discovered that there are considerably more pressing matters requiring our attention.

The formation of the Coalition of European Powers itself is one such matter.

Two rival fleets becoming one coordinated alliance involves an astonishing amount of paperwork.

Admirals are already arguing.

Quartermasters are already complaining.

And somewhere, several thousand clerks are preparing to wage a war against administrative chaos that may prove bloodier than anything fought at sea.

Beyond this, the fleets must be modernized.

New ships must be built.

Old ships must be repaired.

New weapons must be tested.

Supply chains must be expanded.

Dockyards must be enlarged.

And every engineer in Europe is currently insisting that his particular design will revolutionize naval warfare.

Most of them are probably wrong.

A few of them are probably terrifyingly correct.

There is also the matter of trade.

Europe has discovered spices.

A great many spices.

And Europe would very much like to continue acquiring them.

Entire merchant convoys now cross the seas carrying goods whose value somehow exceeds their weight in silver.

The admiralties have therefore concluded that escorting spice ships is a more productive use of warships than endlessly chasing pirates around tropical islands.

Furthermore, there are diplomatic obligations.

Treaties to negotiate.

Alliances to maintain.

Dragons to avoid offending.

Wizards to avoid alarming.

Dwarves to avoid insulting.

Elves to avoid confusing.

And goblins to avoid making bets against.

The last one has proven particularly difficult.

Most importantly, there is the matter of Thrakmoor.

Several European spice vessels have recently failed to arrive at their destinations.

Several wrecks have been discovered.

Several crews have vanished.

And several very angry merchants have begun demanding explanations.

The Coalition is therefore directing increasing attention toward Thrakmoor and the threats emerging from that quarter.

Those responsible for attacking European trade should not mistake our current restraint for weakness.

We are merely occupied elsewhere.

That said, let it be understood that "not actively hunting every pirate in existence" is not the same thing as "approving of piracy."

Should pirate captains once again threaten major trade routes, attack protected shipping, raid allied ports, or otherwise become a nuisance too large to ignore, the fleets of Europe remain entirely capable of rediscovering their enthusiasm for naval warfare.

The cannons have not gone anywhere.

For now, however, the Coalition considers the matter settled.

The Trident has been transferred.

The great crisis has passed.

The fleets are returning to their duties.

The merchants are returning to their ledgers.

The admirals are returning to their arguments.

And the pirates are returning to whatever it is pirates do when nobody is shooting at them.

May it remain somebody else's problem.

Signed,

The Coalition of European Powers

Royal Navy

Marine Nationale

"We have ships to build, spices to buy, diplomats to appease, and entirely too many reports to read."

....

WE'RE PAYING RUM FOR EVERYONE!

Which side will you choose?

• Left side: Wizards
• Right side: Pirates

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