Residential
Hi everyone, I’m looking for some advice/reassurance from anyone who has been in a similar situation.
I’m currently inpatient for my eating disorder and will be stepping down to residential treatment once I’m medically stable and have weight restored. One of the things I’m really struggling with is the idea of entering residential at a “normal” or much healthier weight.
I know logically that residential isn’t only for people who are visibly underweight and that an eating disorder doesn’t suddenly disappear because your weight changes. If anything, I know I’m going to need a lot of psychological support once the focus shifts away from immediate medical stabilization. But I’m still terrified that I’ll get there and feel like I don’t belong or that I’m “not sick enough” compared with other people.
I’m also scared of being around people who may be at lower weights or earlier stages of weight restoration and having my ED immediately start comparing my body to theirs. There’s a part of me that worries people will look at me and wonder why I’m even there, even though I know nobody can tell how much someone is struggling just by looking at them.
I think inpatient has felt very focused on keeping me medically safe and restoring my body, whereas residential is going to involve actually learning how to live with recovery, challenge behaviors and deal with everything mentally. I know I need that, but reaching a healthier weight before I get there almost makes me feel like I’ve lost the “proof” that I deserve treatment.
Has anyone else gone from inpatient to residential after weight restoring or entered residential at a normal/healthy weight? Did you struggle with feeling like you didn’t belong or comparing yourself to other patients? And if so, what helped you get through those first few days/weeks?
I’d really appreciate hearing positive experiences because I want to go into residential willing to give it a genuine chance rather than letting this fear convince me that I don’t deserve to be there. 🤍