Injured during my first BJJ roll with an instructor — is this normal, and how do I address it?
I’m a woman who’s completely new to BJJ. This was only my second class and my first time sparring. The woman I rolled with is also an instructor, has around five years of experience and has fought professionally.
The first half of the session was spent learning different moves, and I was paired with this same instructor. I was struggling to remember anything, and she had to constantly guide me and remind me where to put my hands and what to do next. So she’d seen firsthand how little I knew before we got into the cage.
She also knew how nervous I was. I didn’t really want to spar, but she and the other coach, who is her partner, encouraged me. Before we started, I specifically told her, “I’m really scared and I don’t know what I’m doing.” She said, “Don’t worry, it’ll be fine.” At this point I only knew one move.
We were in the MMA cage for about five minutes, and she kept putting me in different submissions and chokes until I tapped. From my perspective, it felt like she was treating it like a real fight, while I was just trying to escape her grips without knowing what to do.
At some point, while we were standing, she suddenly jumped onto me and grabbed and locked my arm. I wasn’t expecting it at all. I went flying backwards, we both fell, and I hit my lower back/tailbone really hard on the mat. I don’t know enough to identify the technique accurately. It really hurt but I sort of brushed it off at the time. The cage floor also felt harder than the usual training mats.
Afterwards, I took a break and then I was forced to roll with two instructors who were male. Both were so gentle with me. If they brought me down, they lowered me gently to the ground. They would put me in a position or submission and then show me how to get out of it. Those rounds felt like I was actually learning, and the difference was huge.
I brushed off the pain initially, but by that evening it was much worse, right at the top of my bum crack. It’s now been two days and it’s still hurting. Sitting, standing, walking and lying down have been painful, and it kept me awake the last two nights.
When I told another woman who knows the instructor very well, her response was that the instructor is “just really aggressive.” I don’t really know what to make of that or how to feel about the whole thing.
The instructor and I are the only women in this class. I’d wanted to be paired with her because I thought I’d feel more comfortable, but now I feel like I can’t trust her to take care of me during a roll.
I understand injuries can happen, and I’m not assuming she deliberately hurt me. But is this an appropriate way for an instructor to handle a complete beginner’s first roll, especially after they’ve said they’re scared and don’t know what they’re doing? Does being “an aggressive person” explain this, or would you still expect her to adjust to a beginner?
How would you bring this up with the coaches, given that they’re partners? Would you feel comfortable rolling with her again?
I’m asking about training safety and coaching rather than a medical diagnosis.