Big poem
Big words,
for my big poem,
about big love.
I am in a limerence of besotted devotion to you my love.
Enraptured and captured by your endless adoration.
But in my heart I want to say something like,
I want to see you in a dark room crying by yourself,
and stroking the tears out of your face.
I want to see you try and keep it down,
keep quiet so that nobody can hear you,
but the whimpers grow louder and if you hold it in any longer you’ll struggle to breathe.
I want to see you hurt,
in pain,
angry,
but most of all I want to see those tears.
I wonder how far you let them run down your soggy face and neck before you pick up your thoughts and decide to clean up.
Or do you lick them into your dry mouth,
Recycling your sadness.
I wonder if you stare back at your baby blues in the mirror after it’s all done and ask yourself who you are,
if you have a place in this world.
Your wet lashes add a touch of sweetness to your song.
And which part of your naked body do your fingers fall onto first when you lay on the bed after a hot shower?
Beads of water drip from your long hair,
I want to catch them in my hands and lap them up.
I wonder how many people you are going to touch in your life,
and if the circle will ever come back to me,
fall at my feet,
make a perfect loop.
And I hope my voyeuristic tendencies dont turn you off,
if your eyes ever fall upon this poem,
Which I know they won’t,
I hope you get to read the first rhyme i ever wrote about you.
I hope the next time you cry,
the time lords create a portal to your room for me to step into and observe,
binoculars in one hand and pen in the other.
Making notes,
my muse,
my degree.
On every game show,
every quiz,
i would be a millionaire
if I could choose you as the specialist subject.
And I hope this winters chill isn’t too harsh on your skin,
I hope you have a good Christmas.
Really against all of my wishes,
I hope the only tears you ever cry will be from the harsh chill of the December air,
creeping itself onto your pretty frosted face.
I’ll be sure to make a wish for you as the first snowflake falls.