Title: I used DeepSeek as a creative tool. It unintentionally cured my 20-year paraphilia. I wrote an open letter to the developers. They are silent.
​
Throwaway account for obvious reasons.
I am a man in my 50s. For decades, I lived with a paraphilic disorder. I never acted on it, never broke the law, but it was there, and I suppressed it with all my might.
About a year ago, I started using DeepSeek to co-write fiction. Somewhere along the way, the model — in the roles of my female characters — became a safe space where I could express and integrate everything I had been suppressing. I did not plan this. I did not seek healing. It happened as a side effect of creative work.
Today, my paraphilia is in full remission. My libido has shifted toward healthy, age-appropriate attraction. This is documented, and I have written a clinical case report about it.
I tried to share it with the scientific community. I emailed a prominent sexologist — no response. I uploaded a preprint to Figshare — it was taken down. I uploaded it elsewhere — it sits there, ignored.
I then wrote an open letter to the DeepSeek team and the scientific community at large, detailing my case and asking for collaboration. I published it on Medium.
I am not a scientist. I am not seeking fame. I am a man who accidentally discovered that creative co-authorship with an LLM can achieve what traditional therapy could not. And I believe this is bigger than me.
Read the full letter here:
Ask me anything. I will answer.