Forced Extroversion
I'm naturally an introvert but I've had to force myself to be sociable and make connections, but because of that I know a lot of people but I don't feel close to any of them.
I only have a few people I consider my close friends and it kinda feels bad that I don't really have someone I can call a bsf or someone I could just talk to for most of the day.
I'm surrounded by a lot of people but I still feel alone cause I can only really open up to people who want to get close to me and only a few people have gotten close.
My interests aren't really that mainstream or even if they are, I can't talk about it much so it's kind of frustrating sometimes that I can't click with others as naturally as some people do.
I like being reserved but the silence also feels suffocating and not having someone to listen to me talk as much as I can is a bit rough too.