u/12041707198997

i want to be sure i’m understanding things correctly before i reach out to either the sitter, or rover, if need be. this was my first time hiring a sitter!

I left for the weekend and hired a sitter for overnights. I fully understand that doesn’t mean 24/7 care. However, the bed (with brand new pillows and sheets) was fully untouched. the blankets were folded exactly as i left them, including the sweater i had left out for my kitty with my scent on it. i figured okay, maybe they slept on the couch? but the couch was completely undisturbed as well.

also, my cat has pretty specific feeding instructions, for her health issues. 3x a day in small amounts. i understand that not all cats have such specific instructions, but mine does, and the sitter seemed to feel comfortable with it during the meet and greet. i even have meds for her, but decided not to make them worry about it for a couple days, since she’d be totally fine without it. anyways, i come back and the food was given completely different from what we had discussed verbally + what i had written. it was clear that my cat barely ate any of her wet food at all. there were just layers of pate chunks. all i needed the sitter to do was mix her pate with some water. it was CLEARLY stated in writing, and we talked about it in person. it was hard to tell how much kibble she ate, due to the heaping pile in her bowl. AND her water bowl was both low and dirty, indicating it likely wasn’t refreshed.

i’m just…so furious. i’m trying to understand. during the trip, i heard nothing for about 20 hours so i checked in. about 30 minutes later, i got a photo update. the next day, the sitter was supposed to leave by noon, but ended up not texting me again until about 3pm, which was weird. it makes me worry that they didn’t get over there until that time. it took a lot for me to remove my cameras and trust this person, out of respect for their stay at my home.

i’m not asking for perfection, but i did really try to make it as foolproof as possible. i got home and my kitty has seemed to be okay, although not eating much a day later. she ate a lot more than usual right when i got home yesterday, though, as she was hungry.

my first kitty died horrifically and unexpectedly in december. saddle thrombus. he was in agony. i had ptsd & ocd before that happened, but it’s caused both to spiral out of control. i’m in therapy and on meds and doing better overall, but i still just have these moments.

i have had a new kitty for 3 months now. i’m going on vacation for 2.5 days this weekend. i’ve never left either of my kitties overnight before and i’m so terrified. i’ve never even left overnight without taking my first kitty’s urn with me. i can’t do that this time.

i have a rover sitter who was great at the meet and greet, they’re staying overnight and will be around a lot. i’m losing my shit though. i leave tomorrow. i’ve had so many breakdowns about it today. i’m so scared that my kitty is going to die, and it’s going to be my fault for leaving her.

i also just feel insanely stupid because it’s been so long? i can’t talk to my friends anymore about it. i know i’m gonna cry every night. it’s embarrassing. my brain feels broken. i understand that i’m just more susceptible to ptsd due to my history but wow i feel like such a child when it tears its head like this.

i’m perusing marketplace and local nurseries, but having a hard time finding these specific plants:

- purple coneflower

- black or brown eyed susans

- anise hyssop

- swamp milkweed

- goldenrod

- asters (especially blue asters)

- blue vervain

any leads?

or if you/someone you know around here has any they’d be willing to share, i’m very interested in paying for them! i’’m also willing to dig it up myself if needed. thanks!