u/1question-throwaway

I kind of casually dropped something really dark from my past on my therapist and then laughed it off and moved on to talking about something else.

I don't know why I brought it up other than a train of thought thing, where it was thunder storming out and I mentioned I like storms, then mentioned it was one of the few positive memories I have with my mom, then the dark thing which was related to storms and that.

I told him it doesn't happen anymore and he just said something along the lines of he's glad about that and matched my energy

But I'm worried he'll think I see the dark/grim thing as only a joke.

Would it change how you see a client?

I don't want to go into details, but my mom was more hands on growing up than necessary and I'll leave it at that. >!Not hands on for punishment - for other reasons!<

I've spoken to my therapist about this, about how it's some of the worst trauma I've experienced and (trigger warning for capital T trauma) >!I saw another kid die as a kid, convinced myself it was my fault somehow, yet this effects me more!< .

I've told him before how invalidating it feels that anyone I've told has minimized it, even my partner didn't think it was abuse.

A few sessions ago I asked him if it was abuse. He just replied it was up to me.

I do plan to talk to him about this again, but is it most likely the case that what she did wasn't abuse if not even my therapist sees it as inherently abusive?