Mom's friend making funeral about herself. How to calm down?
I'm still fuming about this, so I'm making a post because I don't know what else to do...
Today I was made aware that my mom's "best friend" wants to read a 3-page text about her friendship with my mom at her funeral.
Now I've lived with my mom, everyday, for over three decades. We were very close and she would tell me everything.
I know for a fact that my mom did not consider this person to be her "best friend." Deep inside, she knew they had nothing in common, but could not bring herself to let go of her, for the simple reason that they had grown up together.
What's more, this "friendship" was exhausting to my mom, because this person would talk talk talk all the time, barely letting my mom get a word in, and ever if she did, it wouldn't be long before she'd interrupt with something that she was suddenly reminded of (and that had to do with herself and not with my mom).
And now, even for her memorial service she won't be able to shut up.
She needs everyone to know how good a friend she was, and how many memories she had with my mom when they were teens, during the good times... all while conveniently skipping the fact that she was never there for my mom when my mom started having health problems.
In fact, as soon as my mom started showing signs of cognitive decline, she immediately ghosted her. Never visited her at all, and already started replacing her with one of my aunts (the only one who could tolerate her as a friend).
I knew she would pull something like this. As soon as I knew that she was coming, I was thinking "there is no way, that she 'absolutely wants to be there' (in her words) just for the sake of quietly paying her respects to my mom without drawing attention to herself. She wants to be there just because it's an opportunity for her to find people to convince that she was close to my mom and such a good friend..."
And sure enough, my prediction was spot on.
I've already decided that I won't be attending my mom's funeral, but if I did, I would have had to step away the moment this person opened her mouth... And even without attending, this still makes me mad.
I did not pay those expensive funeral costs for her to make herself the main character.
What should I do? Should I tell a trusted family member that I'm not okay with this?