Not Sure How to Describe My Feelings.
I did not grow up in a nudist environment. When I think back on my childhood though, I do remember certain things. Tags inside my shirts always bothered me and my mom would have to cut them off. I remember streaking throughout the house after showers and I occasionally tried to sleep nude as well. I would be scolded whenever I was found nude in bed. Aside from that, I would spend time nude around the house whenever I had it to myself even as a teenager.
In the past year or so I have again, started to spend more time alone nude. What’s different now is that the lengths of time have become longer. I can now spend hours on end without wearing any clothes and it is definitely my preferred way to sleep. I feel like my body has started to adapt to it. The only issue now is that I have developed sensory issues with clothes. My job requires me to wear button down shirts and dress pants. I am constantly aware of the way clothes feel on my body. Taking them off has become a form of relaxation and a way to de-stress. I feel like I'm becoming increasingly aware of how performative the act of wearing clothes is.
Despite all of this, I haven’t developed much of a desire to participate in social nudism. I don't feel as if I need to interact with other people in nude environments. I'm starting to view all clothing that is not protective wear to be a costume of some sort and that the nude form is what's most authentic. But for me, nudity seems to have become a method I use to achieve peace, relaxation, and to feel most like myself. I have superficial knowledge of nudist/naturist philosophy but I thought it would be useful for those who actually identify as such to analyze my situation.