Not coping well, would give millions for one more day with my noodle boy
now that I’ve had some time to process, I feel ready to put my thoughts into words how empty I am. there’s a big, greyhound size hole where Gary used to be. He was only 7.5 years old and passed his 6th gotcha day as the first dog I got with my husband. he was a covid dog that was very attached to me, we did everything together
2026 has been a rough year for my household. On February 2nd, we were driving home from a weekend trip to a call from the place where we have boarded our dogs many times before - that Gary wasn’t putting weight on his front left leg and was in a lot of pain. I brought him to the vet that night and they found a lesion on his front shoulder. Our vet (who was grey savy) advised it was most likely osteo and the radiology review had the same conclusion. For the next month, i did a chest xray, bloodwork, a ct scan, an oncology consult and a meeting with Dr Couto.
after the lesion hadn’t grown in the month between initial X-rays and ct scan plus Gary was no longer limping plus there was no sign of spread, Dr couto, our oncologist and the radiologist that reviewed the ct scan all were confident it was a benign bone infarct. Gary has an old track injury on his rear right leg where he didnt use the leg - an orthopedic surgeon examined him and advised it would be hard to know if he would adapt well to amputation. they said maybe if we were able to keep up the NSAIDs and work on building up strength in the rear leg. I was ecstatic and we took him on a trip with our other dog to the Finger Lakes to celebrate.
2 months later Gary is limping again. A week ago the leg gave out and there was screaming. The NSAIDs didnt help and this weekend his shoulder gave out completely. we took him to the vet thinking he had a shoulder tear. The xrays showed that the lesion was double the size and the bone was close to fracture. My husband and I decided that it was time - he was sick and we didn’t think, based on the information that we had gathered, that he would have done well without his front leg due to already being a pseudo tripod and because we had caught the cancer months after it had been progressing. He was in so much pain and he couldn’t run or walk or play.
I'm devastated, frustrated by the vets that gave me the wrong information when I was prepared months ago to persue any treatment option and told me he was okay. I also feel so so guilty because I made the decision to let him go when many other people in my rescue had good results with amputation and chemo. i am traumatized and don’t think I will be able to have a greyhound again because of how rampant osteo is. In a few months, when we are ready, we may go back to fostering as both my husband, myself and our other dog are lost without that “big dog energy” in the house.