Unhappiness
I have recently been struggling with unhappiness and loneliness. I have a beautiful 2 year old I stay at home with and he truly is the best part of my days and the only person besides my dad who I feel loves me unconditionally. I attend all the activities with my toddler to get us both out and socialized. Story time, swim, etc. I still am struggling to find my group of moms that I feel comfortable with and can relate to.My family lives far away and so do my few friends I have. My mother in law is the only person we have to help and she only commits to a couple of hours a week. I will add she is unemployed and often occupies her time with busy work that I won’t get into. My husband has said before that he wishes she would help more and not be so clueless that we are both drowning. But maybe we should be honest with her? My husband struggles to understand where I come from when I say I am unhappy and lonely. He says I should be grateful and that I should not be going to him for mental health struggles. He doesn’t want that burden and I get it. He has been working two jobs for us and has his own struggles. It’s not that I’m ungrateful I am just desperate for human connection and people I can relate to. He is always on his phone when we are alone, eating dinner with our toddler, etc. he is always checked out and that contributes to my loneliness. My mother in law will leave as soon as I get back from a grocery store trip. Pretty much runs out the door and that contributes to a lot of my loneliness. I’m looking for a solution here and I think that would be for me to get something part time once my husband’s second job is over for the summer. I also think that could add to my burn out that I am feeling because I know the chores I do would not change. Is this just a season? Will I look back on these years and think I was foolish and ungrateful? Or will I look back on these years and feel sorry for myself for not getting help sooner?