u/Actuallyeddiediaz

Kinda numb rn tbh. I wasn't on my phone for a few hours because I was making dinner and spending time with family and I come back and she's left me this long paragraph explaining that she wasn't in love with me and she'd realized a few WEEKS ago that she was straight. I knew she liked guys and I knew she'd been with some before (we were bestfriends before we dated) but she always said she didn't think she'd ever marry one. She thought she'd marry me. She said that all the time and talked about our future in such detail I really believed it. I've always been very independent and self sabotaging so I never thought marriage was something I wanted, until I met her and she was the only person I'd ever consider sharing my space with. I just don't get it. For weeks. She knew for weeks and didn't tell me because she "hoped it would go away." Have she had told me maybe it could've ended more mutually but no it was just a text. She was too teary over the phone, but I was too. She said she felt so much guilt and I said she should! She waited for so long! She made me look stupid! Everytime she said I love you and talked about our future so preciously, she was lying. I am so in love with this woman. I don't see myself ever getting married, which doesn't concern me too much but it does when I realize it couldve been her. I'm always very strong on self respect and knowing what I deserve and that's a huge part of who i am but tbh, I'd be anyone if it meant I could be with her. She asked if we could still be friends and I want to because I love her but I don't know how I can look at her and not think of what we were. She kissed me. My sexuality is always something I struggled to accept but in being with her I came to accept that i didn't care what people thought because atleast I was loved by her. And she kissed me. And I feel like it meant nothing. All these things she said meant nothing. I just keep thinking there was someone else. Surely someone pops in your head when you're questioning your entire sexuality, no?

Idk. Just feeling the need to talk about it. I feel so lost. Sorry if this is scatterbrained. Any advice?

What's your interpretation of what Carmy meant when he said this to Syd? I've seen it alot of different ways and I'm curious because I think I'm thinking shallowly about it.

Tbh, I would've been mad too if my employee came to me during a rush with some side hobby instead of actually working 😭😭 but I felt soo bad for Marcus because he clearly looks up to Carmy and he was so excited to show him that he finally perfected his donut recipe he just didn't know what was going on hahaha he's in his own world at that pastry station istg

Tbh, I liked Claire! I know a lot do people think her character was very boring and shallow, which, sure. Maybe there wasn't much to her but I blame that on the writers. She could've been expanded on and kept as like a cool side character!! Which I guess they did a little bit but yk, I wanted more! I wish she wasn't only seen as carmys love interest because we know that she's been around the berzatto family since she was a kid and I wish I could've seen more of her relationship with them other than Richie talking about how much he loves her and how special she is.

Don't get me wrong I love Sydcarmy! I think they're so cute and there's def something going on there. Does Claire know he writes in the margins? I wouldn't be mad if either of them were endgame.

Not hard to satisfy me here 🙂 what do you think?