How to handle relationships
As of 3 days ago, I ( Trans woman 26) tested positive for HIV. It was a hookup after ending things with my cheating ex. Surprisingly when they told me I was positive, I called my ex as a reflex. I knew he’d be there for me and he was. He came and showed support. Initially, I thought maybe I should just forgive him because I’ll never be loved again by anyone else. As the days went on, I did more research and I realized as well those feelings from what he’d done still lingered. I appreciated his support and care but couldn’t bring myself to forgive and work things out with him. I know in the end he would definitely support me and be there for me however, I feel as though shifting my boundaries and feelings based on my positive test. Does it ever get better? I told him tonight that I have to focus on my health and being with him causes me immense stress and I don’t need that in my life right now. Do you ever find love? Do you ever find someone who won’t treat you differently because of it? How does the love for yourself grow? I just want to feel strong and support. I have my first appointment tomorrow to start my meds and I’m grateful. Still very disappointed in myself for allowing myself to be in the situation. Any advice or any kind words are welcome <3