I wish I could delete you
I wish I could delete you.
These late night thoughts of you when the day slows in the back of my mind there you are.
I hate living in this space.
I have things to do and I would love not thinking of you.
I don't care if you're thinking of me or at least I tell myself that.
It's been difficult to go cold turkey from you. I see the flags now. I replay things. I wasn't perfect myself. I never saw the dagger because my back was turned.
The pain doesn't affect me as much as when you first broke it off with me. Loss is there. I don't think of the loose ends and updates about characters in your life as much.
I wish you would've rejected me at the start. I took a gamble on you and feel foolish. In the best moments I tell myself you made a choice for your life and it's not personal on me. At my worst I just picture you and him laughing at me.
I tell myself this all will pass and I just need to stay in these feelings but I wish there was a magic delete button. I could hit that and not think about you.