Ex-playboy turned weirdly soft and emotionally vulnerable with me, but he barely expresses feelings verbally and I genuinely can’t figure out if this is love, attachment, comfort, or if I’m romanticizing basic care because I’m emotionally confused and already know we probably can't end up together.
I’ve been seeing this Kashmiri guy for a little over a month and I genuinely cannot figure out what he wants from me.
I’m an MBBS final year student. He’s a final year nursing student from Kashmir on scholarship. My family already said they’d never agree to marriage, so realistically I know this has no future long-term.
This started from loneliness/lust on my side, but things got emotionally complicated fast.
We haven’t slept together because I want to wait till marriage. I’m also richer than him, but I don’t spend money on men. He has a strong social circle too, so I don’t think he’s with me for loneliness, sex, or financial gain.
What confuses me is how he acts.
He used to be a playboy with multiple casual relationships, but around me he becomes weirdly soft and vulnerable. He came to see me even during his finals because I was upset about my dad’s health. He cooks for me, cuddles me, does anything I ask, and becomes almost childlike around me.
But emotionally he’s terrible with words. No reassurance, no emotional talks, no romantic speeches. His version of comfort is usually just kissing my cheek and staying beside me.
When I ask why he’s with me, he just says “love.” Only after a few weeks? I don’t buy it.
Also, I personally don’t care much about money/status. I prefer hardworking, grounded people over flashy/materialistic ones. He’s also genuinely God-fearing in most aspects of life according to mutual circles.
So what is this?
Is this just how some men love — quietly through actions instead of words?
Or am I reading too much into basic care and attachment?
I have to give him an answer about being exclusive by next week and I genuinely don’t know what to think.