Ending relationship with live in partner…
TL; DR: I want to end my relationship but we live together - how can I go about this in the least traumatic way?
Me (39F) and my partner (35F) have been together for 2 years and living together for 1. When we first moved in together the adjustment was really tough on me as I had lived alone for a long time. She was receptive to things that bothered me and made changes. I made changes too. However, a recent fight has made me feel that I need to end the relationship for my long-term happiness. During the fight she YELLED at me for several minutes and, to me, that is a dealbreaker. Along with that and a lot of little things that have compounded over time, it just needs to be over.
Despite the fight, I don’t think she is a terrible person or anything like that. Since this fight, she has been acting totally normal and so I know when I end things she will probably feel blindsided. It will also be awkward because we live together. I am hoping she will return to living with her dad because that is where she lived before we moved in together. However, I know there is a chance that she won’t do this and we will be stuck living together until she finds a place.
I wanted to talk with a therapist to come up with a plan, but of course I can’t get in any time soon and I also can’t fake being okay any longer.
How do I even start this conversation when I know she’s going to feel like it came out of nowhere? How do I communicate that after this fight I have been thinking nonstop about what I want and what I am willing to compromise on, and it’s just not working for me any longer? There are just so many little things that have made it unbearable….