u/Adventurous_Coast477

Level 1/2 autism and emotional regulation. What’s your experience like?

My son is turning 4 in a couple weeks and I’ve just been wanting to connect with other parents who get it. I’d really love to hear about your child, your experiences, or how things changed over time. Sometimes this journey can feel really isolating, especially when a lot of the people around you can’t fully relate.

Let me share some things about my kiddo :)

Personality / Interests: He LOVES learning. Like genuinely loves it. He taught himself multiplication and recently became obsessed with learning Spanish. He does have a rigid interests in numbers and alphabets and can spend forever focused on them. He also loves animals, especially dogs. He’s super energetic, loves running around, and wants to be social, but struggles with boundaries and reading social situations sometimes.

Speech: We’ve seen so much growth recently. During his IEP meeting this year, all of us noticed how much he’s progressed. He’s able to form sentences now to communicate his wants and needs, but conversational language is a struggle. Things like telling me how his day was or answering more open-ended questions can be difficult. I also notice a little echolalia here and there.

We want to start outside speech therapy again because I really feel like he’s on the verge of another leap. Between school, his IEP services, positive behavior therapy, and both of us working full time, it became hard to fit everything in. He does get speech through school though.

This morning he looked at me and said, “Más pan, mommy” asking for more bread. We’re not even a Spanish speaking household, so hearing him independently use words he’s learning just blew my mind. Sometimes I sit there like… how is your brain working right now? It’s incredible.

Did anyone else have a child whose speech really expanded more around 4+? Did conversational language come more with time?

Behavior:
Lately things have honestly been really challenging. We’ve seen a big increase in meltdowns and, more recently, aggression, which is new for him. He struggles a lot with transitions, instructions, or being told “no.” School tells us he does very well there, but once he comes home it feels like he completely falls apart emotionally.

We’re trying hard to support him by keeping things calm, predictable, and less demanding at home, but some days feel really overwhelming. The aggression has been the hardest and most concerning part lately, especially because it’s something we hadn’t dealt with before.

We do have an IPad but I get worried about his usage and what impact it can have on his development down the line. Any advice?

Food:
Food varies so much day to day. He loves fruit and pasta. We boil pasta in broth to try to sneak in a little extra nutrition. Recently the pickiness has become more intense, though. I just ordered some flavorless vitamins to start adding into his water in the mornings to help fill gaps where we can.

School:
He’s currently in gen ed/PCC with an IEP. He loves school. From the first day.

Something positive:
He can be the sweetest, happiest, most loving little kid. He amazes me constantly with how smart and observant he is. Recently I was emotional and tearing up after one of his minor meltdowns, and he came up to me and said, “What happened, mommy? It’s okay,” and gave me a hug. That moment completely broke me because I felt seen by him. I crave that connection between us.

We do have supportive friends and family, but it’s different talking to people who truly understand the day-to-day emotions, worries, wins, and progress.

I find so much comfort in hearing other families stories, especially the hopeful ones. Would really love to hear about your experiences, your child’s progress, or even just know someone else relates. 🤍

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u/Adventurous_Coast477 — 2 days ago

Something my husband and I have been struggling with is understanding what falls under typical toddler behavior versus what may be influenced by our son’s autism. I know it is not a either or situation, and that both realities can exist at the same time, but sometimes autism can feel so front and center that we forget he is still a toddler navigating toddler sized emotions.

Our son is around level 1/2, and will be 4 years old soon. He can communicate many of his needs, though he still struggles to express feelings or explain frustration in the moment. Some days the meltdowns feel nonstop, one trigger after another. Other times, we can go a full week with little to no major incidents. That inconsistency can be confusing because it makes it hard to know what is developmental, what is sensory, what is communication based, and what is simply a hard toddler day.

This morning a perfect example. He woke up asking for French toast. I said, “Let’s go, mommy just needs to use the restroom first.” He completely lost it.

I think one of the hardest parts of parenting a child with autism is not always knowing which lens to use. Can anyone relate? Did it get easier with age? Any advice?

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u/Adventurous_Coast477 — 24 days ago