My girlfriend recently told me she doesn’t count anything we’ve done in a s*xual manner as “ real s**.” For context, my girlfriend has been with a guy before and obviously counts the times she had with him as s*x. However, when I bring up us, she claims she would never claim anything we’ve done as “ real s**. We’ve done oral, penetrative strap-on, and we’ve scissored but very briefly. With her saying this, it has wrecked my sexual confidence and desire to please her because I feel like my sexuality is not validated by my partner, and I feel I now don’t compare/ level to the guys she’s been with. How do I navigate these feelings and not be so hurt by this?
Side note: It’s not that I’m fixated on her interpretation of the word’s meaning, but rather that this is my first sexual partner, and it’s disheartening that she doesn’t appreciate the way I gave her my body and the intimacy I reciprocate on the level I do. I 100% believe what we do as s** and it just kinda hurts to know she does not value our intimacy as much