r/LesbianActually

No false modesty. Own that shit.

Edit: Forgot to mention that it can be either physical or personality-wise :)

I see so many posts about “how do I make it obvious that I like women” or “how do I find out if this person likes women”, and I think there’s a better approach to be considered.

Assuming you are in a location in which it is relatively safe to be queer, I see no reason why we shouldn’t be open about being sapphic, and open about asking other people out.

Cishet men don’t worry about whether or not the women they ask out are hetero.

I think what these questions boil down to is a fear of rejection, which, while understandable, is not a fear that is unique to queer people and is not a reason to be timid about our identities.

If you’re a feminine-presenting person and you want people to know that you like women, wear stuff that SCREAMS “sapphic”, not just whispers it. I wanna see lesbian flags, bi flags, I wanna see shit that says the word “lesbian” on it or depicts women kissing each other, leave the dainty single pair of scissors jewelry at home.

If you see someone you’re interested in, ask them out. “I think you’re cute, would you be interested in going out on a date with me?” leaves no room for misunderstanding romantic intentions.

We have a right to take up just as much space in this world as the heteros do. Let’s start acting like it.

Hey everyone! Tell me about your craziest ex stories or breakup stories because I KNOW some of y’all have been through some wild shit 😭

I’ll go first

We dated for about 4 months. She had bipolar disorder and constantly used it as an excuse for the disrespect and chaos throughout our relationship. There was always some type of drama, especially between her and her ex.

Eventually, I had enough and broke up with her.
After I broke up with her, she left me the craziest voicemails wishing I would die, wishing my whole family would die, and saying she hoped we’d all drown on a cruise.

Like… girl???? 😭😭😭

And that’s honestly just the SHORT version.
Now I wanna hear yours. What’s the craziest thing an ex has ever done to you during or after a breakup? 👀

When youre eating her pussy, your arms wrapped under her thighs, hands holding her hips, so she brings her hands to yours and pets them <<<<<

I am from Romania, I am 39 years old, and I am a lesbian. I consider myself a curious and creative person. I have a degree in psychology and an affinity for everything related to art. I consider myself a sensitive, gentle, kind, optimistic, and positive person. I am always keen on learning something new. I consider myself an introvert, but I am not shy. I like reading, riding my bike, and I love nature very much. I adore animals and I have a cat. I enjoy having discussions on topics such as religion, history, philosophy, psychology and criminal law. I consider myself a warm, empathetic person in whose company people feel free and themselves. I love honesty and fairness, because that is who I am as well.

Okay, so I need to tell someone because I think it's funny.

(I trained my legs yesterday and got sore muscles.)

My gf and I got intimate when we woke up, and when she got down on me, my leg cramped (the cramp also got to my hip), and my body decided to close my legs, so her head was in-between my thighs haha. Thankfully, we just laughed it off.

I also sneezed an ex on her inner thigh before because I couldn't move back fast enough haha (It was one of those sneezes that come so fast you can't even do anything).

What are your funny accidents if you have some?

I need suggestions 🙏 gaydar is trash btw like traaaash

My partner 27f and I 28f got into an argument about my standards somehow that snowballed into her asking me if I am her person. I purposely did not answer because you being my person is not enough. You being my person does not give you a pass to just do anything. I also did not answer because I feel like she would take that and say I should accept because xyz because “I’m her person”. My person is anyone who meets my standards, fulfill my needs in a relationship and is respectful. It doesn’t have to be perfect BUT love is not enough. After that she basically pull the woah is me card and was see I know it I wasn’t your person and someone who wants to marry someone doesn’t say that. I’m confused because I never said she was or wasn’t I said I have a criteria and you can tell me what you can do or not do. If I’m okay with that you’re my person if I’m not okay with that you are not my person.

Am I wrong? I feel like my response was very mature.

Like I have notice it here on Reddit but also every lesbian in rl I have met so far said their longest relationship has just been 6-12 month max. 😅😅 while I’m such a longterm relationship person, like usually 5-9 years (I‘m 31) 😅😅

I wanna hear some crazy stories and pls let me know im not the only one w extra or more crazy exes. Once I had a gf and after we broke up she kept wanting me 7 months and in that time she made 40 instagram fake accounts to try to talk w me💀 (i blocked them all)

And recently, my most recent ex (we broke up almost one year ago), she sent me a freaking email😭 and whats more extra, she messaged me on fucking Spotify 💀 (i didnt even know that was a possibility lol) i anyway blocked her everywhere thats why she found new ways to text me

Whats ur stories?:) ahahaha

I feel like I’m too much.

I rarely build connections with people that I genuinely like, not just physically, but emotionally and intellectually. When I find someone I can actually connect with, someone I enjoy talking to and feel understood by, it means a lot to me.

And maybe that’s where my problem starts.

Because when I like someone, I’m intense. I’m affectionate. I’m honest. I care deeply.

You won’t have to second-guess whether I like you because I’ll show you. I’ll make you feel cared for. I’ll remember the little things. I’ll want to hear about your day. I’ll want to send you random thoughts and stupid little updates. I’ll want to tell you good morning and good night. I’ll want you to know that you matter to me.

And I understand that for some people, that can feel like too much.

But honestly? To me, that feels like the bare minimum when I genuinely care about someone.

I don’t know how to do the half-hearted version of affection. I don’t know how to pretend I don’t care just so I don’t seem clingy. I don’t want to play games or intentionally take hours to reply just to seem less interested.

But sometimes I wonder if I should.

Maybe I need to learn how to hold some of that affection back. Maybe I need to stop giving people everything I feel the moment I feel it.

Because the truth is, I get attached quickly. And when I finally find a connection I really value, I can become so focused on it that I start overthinking every little change.

A shorter reply.

A missed message.

Someone being active but not talking to me.

And suddenly I’m questioning myself.

“Am I being too much?”

“Am I annoying them?”

“Did I scare them away?”

Maybe I am too much for some people.

I just wish I didn’t have to feel like being affectionate, honest, and genuinely excited about someone is something I need to apologize for.

I don’t want to be less loving.

I just want to learn how to love people without losing myself in them.