has anyone with a borderline personality disorder (and treatment resistant depression) undergone ECT (electro-convulsive therapy) while on their mental health journey — and was it successful?
background:
i’ve got the potential to participate in a study that compares the efficacy of ECT against ketamine therapy for chronic suicidal ideation. i signed up for the study in the midwinter when things were real bad, expecting that i wouldn’t be selected, and also hoping that i’d be randomized into the ketamine treatment group.
my study intake has progressed quickly over the past few weeks, while my wellbeing has deteriorated rapidly.
today i got the call informing me that i’ve been formally accepted into the study, and have been randomized into the ECT group. i’ll have to do \~12 sessions (3x weekly) of ECT administered during general anaesthesia.
i did this because i was at the end of my rope and there were no other treatment options available to me under public healthcare (i’m in canada). i was desperate for anything that could help, and it was such a longshot and seemed so far off i figured what the hell.
now that i’m potentially able to start as early as next week, i’m freaking out. my (DBT) therapist is against the ECT treatments bc of the memory loss and cognition side effects. i’m a pretty cerebral person who already deals with a lot of memory impairment — which has been getting worse — so these side effects are really worrisome.
at the same time i’ve been depressed for decades, and ECT actually has a tolerably decent success rate for treating chronic depression that hasn’t benefited from other treatments (that’s why these days it’s usually reserved for a last-ditch treatment when all else has failed).
the hospital knows that i have BPD and that i have a history of concussions and memory issues, but now that i’ve been formally accepted into the study i feel like these are all being downplayed…