Hi hi. I haven't posted on Reddit forever and mainly lurk, but I wanted to share some progress for anyone who feels stuck right now. I started following this group for help back when I was struggling, and it really made a difference.
My history with the green powder goes back to 2020 when I just dabbled with it here and there to control migraines. In 2023, everything changed. I suffered two strokes that were caused by trauma to my neck injuring my carotid artery. The second stroke left me with nerve damage on my left side in my hand, arm, and face. At that time, it stopped being occasional and I became fully dependent on it. I was doing anywhere from 15 to 30 grams daily. Maybe more, I didn't ever count.
Eventually, the side effects from regular use became too much and it totally started to feel like poison in my system. It was creating horrid bowel movements for me and my skin was looking so dull and sad. I had to keep kratom capsules on me when I left the house (which wasn't often in my full addiction) so I wouldn't go through withdrawals from my every couple hour drink. Those were the main reasons, but there are several more. I legit tried to taper, but I stopped because it just wasn't working for me, so I went cold turkey last October. It has been a long road, but I am finally feeling like myself again. The stomach stuff was one of the most stubborn symptoms for me, but it has finally mellowed out completely. I also have no major cravings anymore. I have reached the point where it isn't even a thought in my daily life.
Managing my pain is still a reality, but honestly, I feel like kratom intensified it sometimes, so it is way more manageable now. Also, I feel alive again and that in itself is worth quitting. If you have moved from occasional use into dependence, please know that you can get your life back. It took me a while to feel normal again, but seven months out, I can say it was the best decision I have made. Keep pushing because it really does get better. Like really.