Do I go to the wedding or skip?
Hey everyone! I was invited to a wedding and have to make a decision on whether I should go or not.
Background: the bride and I (both 35F) were very, very close friends for 5 years but quickly fell out of touch after she left our company. We haven't spoken for nearly a decade, and every time we see each other at an event, it's always awkward. She seems to go out of her way to avoid even saying "hello" to me, and tends to stare at me from across the room. The last time I saw her, she quite literally said hello, hugged me, and then ran away before I could even ask her how she was.
Suffice to say, I did NOT think I would be invited to her wedding, but lo and behold, I received a save the date and later, an invitation, in the mail. Many mutual friends will be attending the wedding, and I have been debating what to do. The deadline has crept up on me, and I have to send my response by late next week.
I really don't understand why I was invited. I'm not sure if it's a money grab/seat filler situation, if she genuinely wants me there, or if she feels some sort of obligation towards me since many mutual friends are invited (but this doesn't make sense there have been several mutual friend's weddings in recent years that I was not invited to that she attended, and no one's ever had a problem with it, myself included).
I am a pretty sensitive person and it's always been hard for me to make decisions that have an emotional component to them (I actually would have preferred to have not been invited so I didn't have to experience the turmoil of making a decision tbh). The part of me that is leaning towards going is focusing on catching up with mutual friends who I haven't seen in a while and because part of my brain is saying "surely she must want you there if she invited you." The part of me that is leaning towards not going is focusing on the fact that we have not been "friends" in a long time and that I was likely only invited to help them reach their minimum guest quota and to help pay for their wedding/honeymoon.
I don't know what to do. Friends who don't know the bride are very quick to jump to "don't go," but seem to falter when asked what they would do if they were in my shoes, which isn't helpful. If anyone can provide advice or guidance on how to make a decision, it would be greatly appreciated.
TL;DR - a friend who I haven't spoken to in many years invited me to her wedding. Part of my wants to go because of nostalgia, part of me wants to skip because we're not "friends" anymore.
ETA: For everyone mentioning "free" food and alcohol as their reasoning for why I should go, I'd like to add that I live in a very high cost of living city. The going rate for a standard wedding gift from a single adult falls in the $200-$300 USD range, and $500+ USD for couples. I didn't post this because I was concerned about the finances of attending, but I do disagree with rationale that I should attend simply because I will get dinner and alcohol for "free."