Don’t know what to do now
Hi everyone, I lost my cat almost three months ago and I don’t know how to handle it. I thought by now I would be able to keep it together but every time I think of her I start to sob, and am in a terrible mood the rest of the day. I still think she is here sometimes when I see a black sweater on my chair, a shadow where she always used to sleep, or a creaking noise that sounds like her squeaky meow. Me and my mom had to put her down in late May because she was so sick with liver disease, tooth problems, cancer, dementia, and stuff we probably never knew about. She was 18 when she passed and I am 20, so I maybe have one memory before her. It feels like I lost a sister, she’s always been by my side and now having three months without her I get this guilty feeling of not being able to pet her or brush her but I know it was the right thing to do since she was in so much pain. The only thing I have left of her are some whiskers I collected and her food bowl. I need advice on how to cope, as well as how to cope with the feeling of guilt I have since I love cats and want to get one once I finish college, I feel horrible bc my brain tells me I’m trying to replace her one day which I never want to do. Any advice or related stories would help a ton. I’m sorry if this was kind of incoherent I’ve honestly been crying while writing this because it’s too much to bear.