u/Aggressive_Act_1873

I have been fighting the urge to stop taking medication (specifically my antipsychotic). I have bipolar 1 and ADHD. I am on 2mg of risperdone and 50mg of lamictal. I take them at night. Yesterday I saw my psychiatrist and shared some of my side effects. Restless leg, no motivation, lack of focus, struggling in school, NEGATIVE sex drive (it's torture to partake, would be happy if I never had sex again) PCOS diagnosis (can be a side effect of antipsychotics). My goal was to go to my appointment and get help for my ADHD, which up until yesterday I had not been treated for, and also lower my dose of risperdone to help with the plethora of side effects. She gave me propranolol (blood pressure medicine) for ADHD and did not adjust my meds for bipolar 1. I'm on day 2 of propranolol and not noticing much (which is to be expected). I talked to my boyfriend and he is encouraging me to stop taking risperdone. I cut all my risperdone in half and took 1mg last night. I'm terrified of having a manic episode or psychosis. He has pretty much only known me medicated. He says, "You're not crazy. You're over medicated." He was pissed that after I went to my psychiatrist she gave me more medication. After months of medicine talk and doing all the research on risperdone, I'm feeling frustrated. I told my psychiatrist about the lack of sex drive and she prescribed Wellbutrin. I haven't started it so I could observe how I react to propranolol and see how I respond to 1mg of risperdone. I just don't know how to get through to him that I have bipolar. He says to wean off the risperdone and don't use it as an excuse to act crazy. He thinks it's a choice. The only reason I'm willing to hear him out about weaning off is all the long term side effects. But for reference, my last manic episode I moved out of my parents house, dropped out of school, lost two jobs, spent lots of money, and got really skinny (I couldn't eat while manic). I KNOW I'm stable I'm so GD lazy on risperdone. And the sex thing is killing me. I see my psychiatrist in a month, so I will be closely supervised. I also see a therapist weekly, been sober for a year plus, walk daily, have a decent diet, and do lots of self care. Please advise and thank you for reading.