u/Agreeable-Region-232

I (17f) broke up with my boyfriend (17m). We were in a 3 year relationship, lasting from the end of 8th grade up to Junior Year. We were very happy together, but then he started repeating habits. He was always late to pick me up, or kept me waiting. He waits till the last minute. Mind you we plan our dates WEEKS, EVEN A MONTH PRIOR. I did all the planning, yet he still came late.

One time he kept me waiting for 5 hours from our original planned time he was going to pick me up, this was a day before winter break ended and he wanted to have a picnic with me. I waited and waited until he sent me a text that he was going to be late. then another 3 hours flew by and he was at my door. it was sunset, and when we got to the location it was at a park and it was REALLY cold. he brought those blankets that warm up automatically as well as a picnic blanket. mind you I haven’t eaten for lunch, and I thought he’d be a little more considerate to text me that he was going to be late earlier. I assumed he brought actual food, like a sandwich or something to fill you up. But he didn’t, and instead he only brought Chips Ahoy, hot chocolate, and chips. I was pissed, but I didn’t want to say anything because I thought I was ungrateful. after I got dropped off at my house, my parents asked me why I was grabbing the dinner leftovers they just packed up, thinking I ate enough, and when I told them they were furious but didn’t want to make the situation as big as it should be, so they let me eat. This was our first year of dating.

Another time during the winter of Junior year, I went to support my high school’s musical they held. I love to be early, I love to not keep people waiting. I was outside, and I was the first people there. my friends who I invited came 20 minutes before the gates closed, and I was waiting for about an hour now for him. I asked him a week prior if he could go and he said yes. So I was worrying because time flew and it was now the last 10 minutes before the doors closed, I was cold and anxious because he wasn’t there. all of a sudden I got a text that said “Sorry I’m gonna be there in 10 minutes, I’m dying my hair”. HE DIDNT TELL ME HE WAS GOING TO DYE IT THIS LAST MINUTE? I texted him saying if he couldn’t go, that’s fine, and I was going to go inside to pay for my ticket. I was waiting to pay for him by the way. he did make it but it’s weird since he thought everything was okay.

fast forward to the spring of Junior year, this year, and the announcement of Prom came around. The day it was announced, I texted him asking if he could go. he said yes. then I continued to text him every day until I paid for both of our tickets, he said yes. He goes to another school so that’s why I’m paying. The day I paid for my tickets, I spammed him saying ”Are you sure?” and he said yes. so after I did, which came out to 100$ (50$ was the ticket price for one person), I told him and he said ‘ouch, good thing I’m going.’ I do not have a job because of insurance, I work for art commissions. however, I haven’t had time to open up slots because of school, so I had to ask my mom for money, which I felt bad but she insisted to get my boyfriend (now ex) to go with me.

It was announced early February, I paid early March right when the tickets opened for payment, and it took place in early April. I continued to spam him every day leading up if he was able to go after that, to which he answered yes. The night before the dance, I got a notification. my heart dropped when I received it. “I’m sorry, I won’t be able to make it to your prom.” I was beyond FURIOUS. not only did I made sure that he was able to go, but NOW out of all times? I was in a groupchat with him and a few of my other friends, and I havent checked it in a hot minute. curious, I opened it, scrolled up and backread. I saw his texts about him being up somewhere for a school competition out of state without telling me. I didn’t know he had a competition, he didn’t even bring it up to me. it baffled me since normally school competitions out of state would be announced WAY earlier. And I had to find out through a groupchat, not him communicating to me, and I was angry.

luckily, my friend was able to go in place of him during prom and I had a jolly good time. I ghosted him for the next week after, with him spamming me why I wasn’t responding him. When I opened up the groupchat after checking imessages one again, once he said he was going to try to drive to my house to go check on me, I went online and texted him to give me time and to give me space to think about our relationship. I stated the space part CLEARLY. He said okay, but then proceeded to text me good mornings and nights for the next week, until he texted me basically “Hey, I am upset that you are ghosting me, and me and my parents arent okay with it. I can’t hold my family back much longer, so you should say something before things get bad.”

I then tried to cook up a message for him, wanting to forgive him at first but I double checked the message. HE INVOLVED FAMILY WITHOUT REASON. I wanted my parents to get involved because it did involve their money, but I wanted to handle it on my own because it was immature if I hid behind my parents instead of communicatng. I scrolled in the groupchat an hour later and he said to my friends “My parents are so Close to driving up to her house, once they do I can’t do anything. My family is all pissed at her.”!OKAY IM SORRY? I had to text him that I wanted more time to think and beg him to not get his parents involved.

I broke up with him over text. I didn’t want to see his face or any of that. I know I should’ve communicated better by responding to him sooner, but it was all too much. this was both of our first relationships. if you have questions let me know.