I don’t know if I want to be with my boyfriend
Sorry this is long …Okay so I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year when I met him he’s told me he was in a car crash and has a TBI(Traumatic Brain Injury), we have talked about how because of the accident he’s been angry and depressed ever since which i understand and could help when he gets overwhelmed because i have bpd so i know a lot of DBT skills and have friends with similar issues. I started coming over frequently and staying almost the whole day getting to know the family even spending my birthday with me because my family is all apart far away. What I didn’t know was the outburst, he when he gets mad he starts to hit himself while it only happened bit because I couldn’t go always, i started sleeping over and it just got worse to the point he would hit shit by this time I’ve moved in and it only has gotten worse on top of that he cheated on me which I asked to stay together but it’s just been paranoia that he’s still doing it, so that over and over until now but it’s gotten to the point where I’m mad because he’s not listening to me when he gets mad or if he dose something that breaks my boundaries he apologizes but does the same thing, I can’t blame him because he has short term memory and needs constant reminders I cook clean help set appointments reminding him what he needs to do with him make sure he’s doing daily living fast like washing his hair. At this point I’m tired he started yelling at me when I try to help or calm him down, I feel out of love and I started talking to the person who comforted me when he cheated on me and we are talking kinda flirting and I feel terrible about it because I love my boyfriend so much but I feel like for every thing I do I don’t the respect of one cheating on me and then yelling at me and miss treating me I’ve helped and explained everything on why I was mad on things and every time I would repeat the same thing because he never changes I have to tell him how to comfort me or to even say I’m sorry. I dunno I love him so much at times and I don’t at others and it’s strange or hurting because I feel comfort and care from the guy who I am talking to because he always showed me that, I don’t know what to do I need help