u/Alarming-Composer-81

I'm trying so hard to act normal. I'm finally out of the hellhole that was school, I'm in college doing something I like and now I have friends that like me. Two years trapped inside and now my body wants to keep me trapped. Every joint in my body hurts, my brain refuses to work, I am always sleepy. I want to live a normal life like everyone else so badly, I want to live. I want to write, roleplay, collect, spend time with my family and friends, find a partner... I have reasons to live. But it's becoming exhausting, I have more and more to do and less and less energy. Now my pet rat is sick and she might die too, at least 25% of my energy is going to that and maybe it's still not enough. Everything hurts so badly, and nobody can figure out what it is. I'm so tired of doctors and tests that don't tell me anything. At least in death I would be at peace, I wouldn't feel any pain anymore. I don't want to die, but being alive has been excruciatingly painful. I'm so, so, so tired. I'm burdening my mom and my dad, they give me all the support I need and I'm so priveleged but even them are powerless. I'm so tired of living like this, parasiting off their efforts. Please someone tell me what to do I can't live like this any longer.

Seila, ando sozinha. Mas ao mesmo tempo, não quero só sexo, gostaria de conhecer alguma pessoa de verdade.

Acho o fim da picada vir falar isso no Reddit mas enfim. Sou M18 e nunca consegui ter um orgasmo na minha vida. Sou virgem, mas tirando isso já tentei várias coisas e métodos. Eu chego a me sentir excitada mas só vai até ai. É muito chato, fico com medo de quando achar uma pessoa, eu não consiga sentir nada. Tomei antidepressivos minha vida inteira e sou uma pessoa estressada. Alguém tem alguma dica?

Hello! I saw a post like this and I realized I also don't know how bad my situation is. I think I kind of lost track of how a normal life is supposed to be. In a weekday, I:

6:30am: Wake up, get out of bed, have breakfast, go to college. (Even though, some days I can go) (I wake up with articular pain already)

8:00am: Class starts. Symptoms worsen.

11:15am: get out of class, go home. Once I arrive home, I sleep

12:30am: have lunch. Sleep more.

3:00pm: Wake up, have a snack. Lay down and doomscroll or do another activity in bed such as drawing or playing a game.

7:00pm: Have dinner. Stand under the shower. Stay more on my phone

10:00pm: I go to sleep