u/Alone-Fun5303

Every week around 1 to 3 days, i (35F) give my neighbour (70F) a shared ride to buy takeaway lunch nearby. When she needs a ride, she calls me between 10am to 11am to ask me what time i'm going out, to which I would answer 12++pm (picking her up from her hse). (ETA : 12++ which would be within 12 to 1pm time range i guess to give myself more flexibility. Mostly, I ve been picking her up around 1pm)

Many times, I have been late, around 5 to 10 minutes past 1 pm. I should call to tell her, but she rarely ever picks up or calls me back. Recently, I had to postpone to 1:30pm, and for once, she answered my call. Before hanging up, I heard her complaining to her granddaughter of me being so late. She sees it as a promised time when I see it as a flexible thing and she has no right to complain since i m doing her a favor. She can just not take my ride then instead of being so ungrateful. Yet she even has the gall to hint at how late I was by saying there was not much choice of food left to buy from her regular place, which was a total lie. Her regular place does not sell out dishes yet at that 1pm+ lunch hour.

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Another thing is, before dropping her at her regular place and going off to buy my own food, I tell her, "Meet at the bread shop.". To which she replies me "wait for me at the bread shop." And I repeat again shoutingly a few more times so that she doesn't get the idea that I will always be waiting for her ( as she has bad hearing, thgh i suspect it's selective). So this time, it was taking more time buying my food, and I was around 15 minutes later than her at the agreed place. She didn't see my car waiting for her, she went walking around, locating my car. She must be thinking i just blew her off, and I would never do that. This has happened 3 to 4 times already, and I asked her shoutingly, "Didn't we agree to reconvene there? You just need to wait for me there if you don't see me yet. " I shouted this a few times to her, no acknowledgement whatsoever. I find her such an entitled brat for treating me like her driver or AITAH?

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In the beginning, she even spilt milk tea on my car seat with zero apologies. She tried to pretend it was on the seat cover by offering to wash the seat cover instead. The next day, she brought some soup to me, and no apology still. I refused, but she insisted so vehemently, and I thanked her for it. at that time, I didn't know her well. Also, I didn't want to acknowledge her food as an unspoken form of apology. If she was really sorry, she should apologize with words, not just gestures.

ETA : I told her the ride is just an on-the-way thing for me, not a responsibility which she is taking it for. If i was her, I would just go and watch a video in the comfort of my house, as I would be so grateful someone is giving me a ride for free so frequently.

I don't want to refuse her outright and make enemies with a direct neighbour. She can just stop calling me for the rides instead if she dislikes my flexibility of my own time.