So this happened last Sunday. April 19th. My mom was riding her 3 wheel E bike when I guess she fell over and smacked the front of her face getting small facial fractures. As the story goes she also lost her breath and pulse for a tiny bit as well, but came back when my step father started pounding on her chest and doing mouth to mouth. It took 25 min for the ambulance to show up. She stayed over night in the ER, but was supprisingly coherent and able to eat food pretty well that morning.
Something we noticed right away however, was that her memory was really bad. She wanted to call her Mom, my grandmother, but we had to keep reminding her that she died 3 years ago and that its been hard for all of us. She also kept forgetting why she was in the ER. You would tell her that she had an accident, and then say "what accident?" and then would start touching her face, and it would happen over and over again, as if you were telling her for the first time.
Fast forward to Wendnesday and I get a call from my step dad, that he's concerned that she is not getting much better because she seems much more tired and still has bad memory. I guess that night her blood pressure also dropped and they gave her some fluids. They did many tests over the course of this time, but couldn't find anything until Thursday, where they discovered a little bursted blood vessel in her head.
I guess upon doing more tests, they also found two more tiny brain bleeds. They wanted to make sure that the bleeds were stabilized before they could approve her for rehab the next day being Friday. They ended up clearing her for rehab, but then there was an issue with her insurance that delayed starting rehab until Monday. (Today) they wanted to keep her at first, but she kept insisting to go home, so they allowed her to go home with my step dad and they will do at home rehab.
When I talk to my Mom now, she seems like she is in really good spirits. However, it seems like she can only think so far and still is having really bad memory. She can't remember her accident at all, or the events leading up to it. Anything we talked about leading up to this she seems to have no idea of either. I think she now remembers that her Mom has passed away, so I think there is improvement? She has bad short term memory too. She will eat lunch and then can't remember what she just ate.
My Mom already had a bad tbi when she was much younger in a car wreck, drunk driver hit the car and left her with brain damage, since then she has a harder time moving her right side, but can still do it and she's lived with this disability her whole life, even though giving birth to me and still being able to walk and drive.
A year ago she also suffered a stroke. We caught it early and she recovered very well, but the hearing in her left ear has been impaired ever since then and she seems to get tired faster than usual when walking. She also uses intermittent oxygen since then.
My poor Mom ):
I think what scares me most is the memory problems, the forgetfulness, the unawareness. She seems to be unaware that she had an accident and can't remember much.
I understand that I should just be thankful that she is still alive and I really am, but I find myself having random anxiety attacks and spiraling into depression randomly because I am so worried about her not being able to live a normal life now. I am so worried about her being permanently messed up for forever. I've had to catch myself from projecting my worries onto her and remember to just keep the convo light and fun and positive. Again, she seems to not seem to fully realize that anything has happened to her.
It's just scary. My mom is my whole world, I feel like I have nothing without her. Does anyone have anything that they would like to share that might help me feel better, or even just help me make peace with what I am experiencing?
I need to seriously calm down. I stress myself out to the point of being exhausted thinking about how things might change. I start training for a new job in a couple of days, mandatory 3 week training. I need to be focused and not let this interfere with my life so heavily.
I just want my Mom to be okay and for her to live her best life. I love her <3