u/Ambitious-Hotel-527

Hi all! 😄 It took me a while to get the courage to post my writing anywhere. This is a story that was born in 2020, when a group of friends sat down to play some D&D. It began as murder mystery with a dash of romance and tragedy mixed with Chinese fantasy. If this speaks to you, I hope you'll enjoy it. It's my first attempt at writing a longer form, and what I linked down here is a Prologue and Chapter 1, first draft. The critique that I'm looking for is at this stage mainly about pacing, dialogue and how engaging the plot is.

Link: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1l0-AE7UFfiVqjwId9Wl79r-aJHmUN6J2G_Ge1O_fkJE/edit?usp=sharing

Thanks!