u/Ambitious-Steak-1209

I’m sharing my experience, maybe it will give someone some hope.

I have been depressed since I was 14 years old, I couldn’t even remember ever feeling different. I’ve tried over 20 different medications, including ketamine, to no avail. I decided to try TMS as a last ditch effort, but I didn’t really think it would work, and had originally had plans to end it once the 36 sessions were done.

In weeks 1 and 2, I only noticed some strange rage episodes and a few headaches. In weeks 3 and 4, I noticed nothing at all. Next thing I know, we’re at session 30 and I ask the sweet woman (I don’t actually know her title, I just now realized that) how my score has changed since the beginning. She told me it had gone down (from 23 to 10) and I said “really, that much?” But then it clicked, I’ve been feeling so much better, I haven’t missed work. I can get out of bed and it’s not the most difficult thing ever. I’m engaging in hobbies again. I got caught up with the semester. I would even say I’ve been more social.

I have 3 sessions left now, and I’ve read a lot of people saying it can continue to improve symptoms after you’re done. I don’t know if that will be true in my case but I am looking forward to finding out. If I have to come back in a year, in 6 months, whatever it takes, I absolutely will.

I’m at the perfect spot in my life to just go… wherever. I’m strongly considering leaving for a blood bank only prospect but I don’t have any idea where to start looking. If you could go anywhere in the country (or even out of it), where would you go?

Sharing some positivity today! I almost never interact with patients at my current job. Really it’s mainly during bone marrows and usually the patient is not in a social mood (understandably). I’ve always felt like I stumble through most social interactions in life, so I prefer it this way - I want to help people but I don’t think I’m a very comforting presence.

Anyway, there was a bone marrow and I was quietly doing my thing after the main part of the procedure was done, when the patient asks me for my name. I told her and she asked me what I was doing with my cart. I tried my best to not over explain (my curse) but per usual I was a bit awkward. I didn’t know what to do as she asked more and more questions, we eventually ended up talking about who would be testing the specimens, the usual turnaround time, and the pathologists qualifications. The two nurses in there seemed slightly amused by the interaction but they did eventually come to my rescue.

About a week later I was told a call was being transferred to me because the caller asked to speak to me directly. It was the patient (and she sounded considerably less dazed haha). She thanked me for taking the time to answer all of her questions when I was obviously very busy, she said it was a big comfort knowing her labs were in the hands of some who really cares. I had to take my break after that phone call because it got me so emotional. It’s really easy for me to forget what we do matters. I’m not in this for gratitude by any means but a little bit goes such a long way. I feel so honored that I can take care of people in my own way.