u/Ambitious_Squash5028

Hello everyone! I need help knowing what the right move is so I won’t make a bad decision that would make this person feel uncomfortable around me.

I have a fucked up childhood that is severely messing me up in my adulthood, and growing up I had this big ball of love I would love to share with someone. I just haven’t found the right person yet, but idk, I feel like that changed.

So I work at a restaurant where the majority of the workers are women, so I swore that not only would I respect them, but I also wouldn’t cross boundaries and fuck up the work dynamic. But again, for this one person, idk, I want to cross that boundary line with her.

She came in 4 months ago to train for the job at my store, and the moment I saw her she was the most beautiful person I’ve seen in a while. But we never talked because when I came in for my shift she was leaving, so I couldn’t properly introduce myself. Also, she works at a different store anyway and just came here to train.

Then came one day where she needed more hours, and she came back to my store to work with me. It was just me and her for 7 hours, and omg she is the best person I’ve met so far out of anyone at the job. She’s easy to talk to, I don’t feel like I have to perform with her to make noise so it won’t be boring, and she’s just amazing in general.

Omg, we talk for hours, and I mean hours. I like the way she randomly turns around and talks to me about herself. I’ve been so respectful to her in not crossing that line because I overheard her say to someone else, “Oh I love working with him, he’s so good at his job.” She always asks me when I work, and she writes it down and takes screenshots of the schedule so she knows when I work.

But here’s the thing with her. We also share similar childhood trauma, and she is going through a lot like me. We talk about that a lot, and again, I love how I don’t feel like I need to perform with her. Talking about heavy shit like my fucked up childhood with someone who also has a fucked up one and is dealing with it in adulthood makes me feel seen and heard, and I would love to reciprocate that with her.

And the stranger thing as well is I never in my life prayed to God for a woman, but I did. I kid you not, I prayed to God to let me see her again because that’s all I was thinking about last weekend. Then coming on my shift, who gives me not only a surprise visit but is working with me? She is.

We talked so much that we both had to stop ourselves because it was 3 hours until we had to clock out and we had tons of shit to get done. But she told me she moved around here and will be working soon at this location, but she’s still based at the other one.

But I can’t wait another fucking day or wait until she’s on the schedule with me when I can do something today or tomorrow.

I checked the schedule yesterday and by the grace of God she will be there, and I don’t want to wait to ask her for her number.

I wanna preface that I know this is a lot of boundary crossing, but I want her number so we can be friends first because as much as I want her, I understand that the whole “don’t date your co-workers” thing is there, which is why I want her as a friend. But anyways, in my complicated life I need friends anyway, and I want her to be the main one.

So I know today she will be at the store, but I’m off, and a huge intent will be there if I show up to the job on my off day. I was thinking I was going to go in and just order some food and then ask her, but I feel like that’s just playing around.

But here’s another thing. She told me that at her other store it’s terrible, and one person there is a mega creep that had told everyone that they’re dating, and it was a whole thing. I’m not going to do that, but I would hate it if this person who is so comfortable around me and is always eager to work with me gets weirded out when I show up to the job and tell her:

“I think you are an amazing person, and I was a fool to let you leave Monday and not exchange numbers because I would love to be friends.”

But idk, what do you think I should do? Because my body is screaming.