u/Animator_7620

When I first became a manager, I thought the difficult part would be managing people.

Having tough conversations, dealing with performance issues, keeping people motivated, balancing what leadership wants with what the team needs. All of that sounded intimidating when I started.

But after doing this for a while, the thing that drains me out most isn't any single problem. It's feeling like I am constantly reacting to things.

Most days I am bouncing between Slack, emails, meetings, approvals, questions from the tea and random things that suddenly need attention. I sit down to focus on one thing and before I know it I am doing something completely different because another message came in.

By the end of the day I have touched lot of things but it rarely feels like I have made real progress on any of them.

What catches me off guard is how much of that follows me home. I will get home, eat dinner and tell myself work is done. Then an hour later I catch myself replaying a conversation from earlier in the day or thinking about something that's coming up tomorrow.

It could be a team member who seemed off in a meeting. A project that's moving slower than expected. A decision I am not completely sure about.

None of it is an emergency. I am not even trying to solve it. The thoughts just keep showing up.

I have noticed something else too. After spending the whole day jumping between things Instead of actually relaxing, I will switch between Reddit, Instagram, messages and random articles without paying much attention to any of them. A couple of hours go by and somehow my brain still feels busy.

Would be interested to hear if other managers deal with this too and if you have found a way to actually switch off when the day ends.

Something that's helped more than trying to be disciplined all the time is making bad habits a bit harder and good ones easier.

For example, if impulse buying is a problem, remove your saved card details from shopping sites. Having to find your card and type everything in gives you a few extra seconds to think about whether you actually want the thing or you're just buying it because it's there.

For good habits, do the opposite. Keep the book on your pillow if you want to read at night. Leave your shoes by the door if you want to walk in the morning. Keep the guitar somewhere you can actually see it instead of putting it back in the case every time.

It's a small thing but those extra few steps can make a difference. Especially on days when you're tired and don't really feel like doing anything.

Relying on willpower every single time gets old. Making the good option easier and the bad one a little more annoying seems to work better.

A few days ago I was reading after dinner and when I finally looked up it was almost 10.

Didn't even mean to spend that long reading. I just kept going. Phone was on the couch whole time and I never picked it up once, which is pretty rare for me.

Made me realize I can't remember last time that happened. Usually I will check my phone every few minutes without even thinking about it.

Now I am curious what hobby does that for other people.

What's something that keeps you busy enough that you don't even think about checking your phone?