I feel disconnected from my own life
feel completely disconnected from life. I’m not sad in the dramatic sense, I just feel nothing. I waste entire days on my phone, avoid studying even though exams are close, and every time I try to force myself to work, I stop at the exact moment effort starts.
It’s like I already know what I should do, but I physically and mentally can’t continue. I don’t feel motivated, guilty, hopeful, or even scared anymore. Just detached.
I keep choosing comfort and escapes automatically, even while knowing I’ll regret it later.
Has anyone gotten out of a state like this before?
I want to add that I can't imagine a future for myself. I really can't picture myself in the future, and what's worse is that I don't want anything. I don't want anything in life, not even the good things. I don't want love, I don't want to get married, I don't want to study anything, I don't want to achieve anything. I don't care about my status in society or how anyone sees me. I don't desire anything. The only thing I think I can endure until I die is traveling, but I don't know how to do that, and the problem is, I don't even want to, i just can't kill myself, I don't know what to do, I don't know how to move, I don't even know what to do to be able to travel, and also, I don't even want to, as I said. So anything that requires effort, I don't feel like going through in order to travel. I don't think I can force myself، to do anything, But the thing is, I need to take the exams, but like this, I don't think I'll be able to. I'm 18 btw
Sorry for talking too much