Newly diagnosed, realising how different my life could have been if it happened earlier
I got diagnosed with ocd almost three weeks ago now, and the more time I spend thinking about it, the more I realise how different my life could be if I was diagnosed earlier.
I'm in the early stages of figuring everything out, as having ocd wasn't even something that crossed my mind until my psychiatrist brought it up to me. And im realising how much of my life is controlled by it, and it scares me. So many things I do daily in order to soothe my anxiety are compulsions, and acknowledging that in itself feels way way way too big.
Currently coming off the medication I've been on for anxiety in order to change to something that may be more helpful for me. My brain is so foggy and loud at the moment, and I feel so out of control. All of the little voices that I could kinda ignore on that medication are so loud now, and so many of them are things I know are irrational, or aren't really me, but they feel so real.
The realisation of how different my life could look if someone had realised that so many of the traits people have been labelling as anxiety, autism and depression is really ocd before now is hitting me really hard.
It's both a sense of clarity and grief, and I don't know how to process all of this right now.
Guess I'm just rambling in this sub, because I feel really alone right now, and want to hear how others came to the acceptance of their diagnosis, and how others dealt with the grief of losing so much time to not knowing what was really going on for them.
(I'm aware that I'm partially making this post as reassurance seeking, to know I'm not alone in this experience, but I'm also genuinely looking for advice on how to deal with this all, because I'm just so overwhelmed right now)