Back when I was in 7 grade, I started talking with a Chinese girl of my school online.
She was a nice, smart and a good person in general It seemed like that relationship would be a normal one, until I fucked it up.
Back in that time, I was Influenced in many ways, and as some of you may know, teenage boys are not the best people to be around with.
Dark humor, edgy humor or any shitty name they use to call it, that was where I was Influenced.
Im not saying that the bs I did its not my fault, that shit is totally on me. But it's obvious that I was influenced by my surroundings at that time.
I made some racist """""""jokes"""""""" about her nationality, saying that she eated dogs, cats, humans, aliens, etc.
Not much time after that, I got confronted by this (entirely deserved), and I realized that this type of humor could be offensive to people you barely knew.
I felt like shit at the time, and I still do. I said sorry to her (in a very shitty way tbh), and she forgave me. That suprising or not.
I still feel like shit for what about I did to her till this day. Guilt sucks. But I deserved it.
Now, I think im a better person. But everytime I think about that, I still feel like crap.
Just wanted to vent, idk.