Rhett was Scarlett's only real friend
I finished rewatching the movie last night. I have read the book 100x more than I have watched the movie, and I noticed some things. It's so long, but it does not drag AT ALL. In fact, knowing the book so well, the movie seems to fly through the story at speed. I will definitely be seeing it on the big screen for the first time in October. I hope there's a real intermission!
Another really sad thing I noticed, is that by the time they flee Atlanta, Rhett is not only Scarlett's closest friend, he's really her only friend. He's the only person who really knows her, the only person she can be herself with. Melly is always there for Scarlett too, but she doesn't really know Scarlett. Mammy really knows Scarlett, but given their positions, they can't be said to be friends. That leaves Rhett, who clearly loves Scarlett. Even much earlier at the dance, his feelings are beginning to show.
That's why it's so sad when their marriage deteriorates. Once Melly dies, Rhett is the only person left for Scarlett, and by then, it's too late. The scandal of Ashley and Scarlett getting caught embracing is the last straw for him, because it hurts not only all four adults, but also Bonnie. He still loves her, but he no longer likes her. There is one moment when it might have been repaired, when she tells him she is pregnant again, but that is ruined almost immediately by both their reactions. The acting here is superb.
Another thing I noticed, as someone who teaches kids about consent every day, is the lack of consent in their every romantic interaction. Rhett is always grabbing her and forcing her into a passionate embrace, which she then sometimes likes, but there are other times she is clearly pushing him away. We can say "it was a different time" but I don't think it is only a reflection of 1930s ideas about romance, as much as it is simply reflecting Peggy Mitchell's fantasies. Learning that Mitchell was so interested in erotica, that she was a lil bit freaky, makes me wonder if she dreamed of being ravished by a handsome renegade, and wrote that into her story. I mean, the scene at the dinner table after Ashley's party, right before the staircase scene, is downright scary, but Scarlett awakens the next morning like she enjoyed sex for the very first time. She's a new woman, but Rhett is ashamed and regretful. They are never on the same page at the same time. It's tragic.
I know we would all like to think that they end up together, somehow, in an imagined future. But it's probably more likely that Rhett never returns, and Scarlett lives out her life pining for him, like a Southern Miss Havisham. At least, that is what the movie leaves me thinking.
It really is a masterpiece.