u/Apprehensive-Log8333

I found out yesterday that our agency is getting cameras. At the front and back doors and parking lots, I don't have an issue. Lobby, I can see that being OK, but have some reservations as our admins are not comfortable with that. And they want to put one IN MY OFFICE. Not anyone else's office, just me. This is supposedly because I do all the intakes. We are told they will only be viewed if there's an incident, but also that all high-level managers will be able to look at them anytime. Also, there won't be audio, but I have read that some surveillance systems are now able to read lips.

In the seven years I have been here, there has NEVER been a situation where we were wishing "If only we had video of that incident." I asked around and someone remembered an incident 12 years ago, but that happened in the parking lot. These cameras have already gone into other locations, and we have heard that a certain manager is using them to scold employees for stuff like what they were wearing or doing, no client involved.

There is years-long earned distrust for that manager, against whom multiple HR complaints have been filed. Eight people have quit because of this person's abuse. I have cried multiple times and have comforted many other people after run-ins with them. And now they'll be able to watch me working in my office whenever they want? I find this unacceptable.

I do not think I will be able to feel safe and comfortable with a camera watching me at all times. I was told that when this came up in a leadership meeting, leaders from my office immediately said "OP will quit if you put a camera in her office." I also have a caseload, the littles probably won't care, but the teens are going to have a big problem with a camera during therapy.

Putting aside the fact that we have never actually needed footage of an intake, I do many intakes in a different room with less breakable stuff than my office. I guess I could be OK with a camera in there, and just do ALL the intakes in that room. My office is my safe space. Sometimes I change clothes in there. It is my sanctuary. I don't think I could tolerate this. It would be super easy for me to get a different job. But I love my coworkers and agency, I don't want to leave.

Any advice? What would you do?

Edit: I have written to HR about my concerns and gotten a warm reply. I spoke with Boss who is also Not Happy. Coworkers also Not Happy. I plan to write a letter and see if I can get all my coworkers to sign on. Apparently we have some time to push back. Thanks, everyone!

Edit2: My supervisor claims that having a camera in every therapist's office is just normal and standard and nothing to be concerned about. I asked if there is a camera in her office right now (it was a zoom meeting) and she said no!

Edit3: I spoke with each of my coworkers yesterday and got everyone's perspective. Everyone wants to sign the letter. One very key coworker said they will likely quit if there's a camera in their workspace. Several think our rural population will strenuously object to cameras and it will be a barrier to care. Proposed Flock cameras are a hot-button issue in town right now, uniting everyone. I will finish the letter over the weekend and we will sign and deliver it Monday. I also checked with colleagues at the other 2 agencies in our town. They do not have cameras and expressed horror at the idea. I think we have a good chance of at least limiting the cameras.

The more I think about it, the more it seems like intakes are the least in need of surveillance, since there are always multiple people, including parents, present. Everyone is in agreement that this feels like employee surveillance, and not something intended to protect us from imaginary allegations of abuse.

So it seems the merch store that used to be on the JRAD website is gone. When I went to the show, I didn't get a t-shirt because I thought I could just get it online. BUT I CAN'T. And the knockoff shirts are not as good, I'd rather my money went to the band. What happened to the merch site???

If anyone would be willing to get me a shirt at an upcoming show and send it, I'd be incredibly grateful, throw in $20 for you and also pay for shipping. I wanted the black one with the octopus design in XL. DM me if you would be willing to help me out. Thanks, siblings!

I finished rewatching the movie last night. I have read the book 100x more than I have watched the movie, and I noticed some things. It's so long, but it does not drag AT ALL. In fact, knowing the book so well, the movie seems to fly through the story at speed. I will definitely be seeing it on the big screen for the first time in October. I hope there's a real intermission!

Another really sad thing I noticed, is that by the time they flee Atlanta, Rhett is not only Scarlett's closest friend, he's really her only friend. He's the only person who really knows her, the only person she can be herself with. Melly is always there for Scarlett too, but she doesn't really know Scarlett. Mammy really knows Scarlett, but given their positions, they can't be said to be friends. That leaves Rhett, who clearly loves Scarlett. Even much earlier at the dance, his feelings are beginning to show.

That's why it's so sad when their marriage deteriorates. Once Melly dies, Rhett is the only person left for Scarlett, and by then, it's too late. The scandal of Ashley and Scarlett getting caught embracing is the last straw for him, because it hurts not only all four adults, but also Bonnie. He still loves her, but he no longer likes her. There is one moment when it might have been repaired, when she tells him she is pregnant again, but that is ruined almost immediately by both their reactions. The acting here is superb.

Another thing I noticed, as someone who teaches kids about consent every day, is the lack of consent in their every romantic interaction. Rhett is always grabbing her and forcing her into a passionate embrace, which she then sometimes likes, but there are other times she is clearly pushing him away. We can say "it was a different time" but I don't think it is only a reflection of 1930s ideas about romance, as much as it is simply reflecting Peggy Mitchell's fantasies. Learning that Mitchell was so interested in erotica, that she was a lil bit freaky, makes me wonder if she dreamed of being ravished by a handsome renegade, and wrote that into her story. I mean, the scene at the dinner table after Ashley's party, right before the staircase scene, is downright scary, but Scarlett awakens the next morning like she enjoyed sex for the very first time. She's a new woman, but Rhett is ashamed and regretful. They are never on the same page at the same time. It's tragic.

I know we would all like to think that they end up together, somehow, in an imagined future. But it's probably more likely that Rhett never returns, and Scarlett lives out her life pining for him, like a Southern Miss Havisham. At least, that is what the movie leaves me thinking.

It really is a masterpiece.

In both the movie and the book, Melly takes off her nightshirt to wind around the deserter's head. But they had a haversack RIGHT THERE! Why didn't they empty it out and use that?

It's a small thing, but it always bothers me

I am not that familiar with this creator, I found him through Milo Rossi/miniminuteman, and at first I thought he doesn't really seem like someone who would enjoy GWTW, so I wasn't sure to expect from this video. But he really, really loves the movie, and that comes through loud and clear. There is a lot of historical information about Margaret Mitchell, her life and the time she lived in, as well as stuff about how the movie was made. And he LOVES Scarlett's dresses! Like, a LOT. The video is not at all just about racism in GWTW like the thumbnail implies. He's clearly read the book multiple times as well.

Seeing the included scenes made me want to watch the movie again. In fact, there are so many scenes from the movie that this video got demonetized by YouTube, which is unfortunate, but I guess Atun-Shei is just in it for the love of GWTW. I will definitely be watching Part II, and I subscribed to his Patreon too. I really enjoyed this video!

We have been estranged for 11 years and were very low contact for years before that, her choice. She was abusive my whole childhood, then took my child from me when child was 4 and raised her to hate me. It didn't take and my adult daughter and I are now becoming closer. Daughter was not abused but was emotionally neglected. Still, she is relatively close with my parents. I did not attain good mental health until age 50.

Mother is now 80. She's been bedridden for some months, needed a surgery that could not be done due to her poor general condition. My daughter has been sad because she hasn't been allowed to visit for 6 months, though she'd like to help. She was informed that Mother had a fall, broke a bone, went to the hospital, developed hospital-induced psychosis, and is now in a skilled nursing facility.

Daughter was happy because she is being allowed to visit. She was able to talk with her grandmother and said she was lucid and knew who she was. But I wonder if she's being allowed to visit because it might be the last chance. Both mother's parents lived into their late 90s, so I thought we'd have more time. I guess I never let go of the idea that we would reconcile at some point.

I'm not angry at her anymore, I think. At her age, she's not the same person that she was. I just feel....nothing. I'm not sad or afraid. She had made it clear to my daughter that she didn't want to see me, and any mention of me "upset her," so I don't have to wonder if I should do the cross-country trip (I got as far away as I could.)

I feel bad for my daughter because she is clearly worried. But...my parents had been refusing to attend her upcoming wedding or have anything to do with it. Like she's been going through the same "attached even though it hurts" thing that I went through at her age.

The whole thing is just really sad. It's sad that my mom went through such trauma that it rendered her incapable of having a loving relationship. It's sad that my daughter and I were separated and each suffered from it. It's all just....unfortunate. Maybe I am not processing what is happening, I don't know. She is very much on my mind, but I feel no strong emotions about it.

Is this....normal?