u/Artistic-Season7497

So, this happened a few days ago, and it’s been weighing heavily on my (29m) mind. I had a bad dream. A very bad dream. In it, I was inside this strange room that looked almost like a classroom combined with a cafeteria and an airplane hanger it was so huge. There were these long lunchroom tables in the room and it was jam packed full of people. I was towards the back, and it was almost like a bizarre AA session. People would get up and say their names and why they were there, and then everybody would like talk them through what they were going through. Well, it was suddenly my turn, so I stood up to speak. IMMEDIATELY everybody turns away and won’t look at me. I’m shaken by this, but I say “ hello, my name is blank and I was raped by my sister when I was a child, and now I don’t know how to live” silence. Nobody reacts. Nobody offers comfort or advice, like they did with the others. All I can see is their backs and their body language telling me they feel uncomfortable with me speaking and wishing I would leave. “Why won’t you guys look at me?” I say. I start to cry. “Please, someone help me. Why doesn’t anyone care?” Silence. I sit down. I am sobbing now. Someone sitting near me stands. Everyone immediately turns and faces them. They say exactly what I had just said, verbatim. Everyone hangs on their every word. Everyone gets up and says”oh my god, I’m so sorry that happened to you!” They all comfort him. They all move away with him to the other side of the room. I am left sitting completely alone in this big room full of people at this huge empty table. I cry uncontrollably. I feel as though my very soul has been ripped out. I wake up to my alarm clock going off. It is 6 am. I must get up and go to work. I want to stay in bed and cry. But I can’t. There is something wet on my face. I realize I was crying for real in my sleep. Why did my brain do this to me? Why can’t I just be left alone? Why can’t this bullshit just go away. It happened damn near 25 years ago. I want it to go away. It’s bad enough I hate me job and being alive. Now I’m being tormented in my dreams too. I don’t need this. I don’t fucking want this.