u/ArtisticFuel630

Off Ativan for 13 weeks + 1 day today. Only took 1mg for 2 months ish and tapered in two weeks. Kindled by stopping and starting again a lot.

My symptoms are still cycling between very intense fatigue, super dry eyes and then, if I get a burst of energy, nerve pain like pricking all over my body and electrical jolts down my legs like happening today. Like I need to run, but I have no exercise tolerance.

I tried to do a short 20 min very low impact workout and I induced a massive wave that lasted all day, couldn't keep my eyes open and was so weak I couldn't walk. Had to spend all day bedridden.

Today, my legs are very electrical feeling and twitchy, feel like super high energy in my legs and I have the pricking in my finger tips. Getting head pressure again now. Last night, my brain was itching terribly like tingling and itching so badly, not my scalp, my brain.

At this point, I don't know if any of this is even normal for short-term use benzo withdrawal or if this could potentially be long covid. I've gone through so much health testing, my doctor is telling me it's long covid as I had covid a month before all this went down. In any case, there seems to be no cures. My blood pressure is also too low, like 90/50 and that's not usual for me, so clearly my nervous system is struggling.

The biggest symptom I wish that would go away is the fatigue, it's crippling. Most everyday I'm either tired or worrying about feeling tired again. It sucks.

Anyway, just wanted some support. Been over 3 months of this now.

Hi everybody.

I don't really use Reddit, but didn't have anyone else to talk to.

I'm 28 years old and I just lost both my grandparents last year.. my papa to lung cancer within a few months and my nanny pretty suddenly. I have three children. I've always been a neat-freak/perfectionist since I was a child, I was also abused by my parents - my grandparents were the only safety I knew and they're gone now. I don't have any other family left. I developed full-blown OCD after that loss, and I've been struggling.. I've been trying to stop, but I don't know how.

Mine revolves around house-cleaning and constantly checking lists and if certain areas of the house are clean, if pictures on the wall are perfectly straight.. obsessively-so. I used to just have a cleaning schedule that I abided by and that was that, if I saw a photo frame on the wall that was a little crooked, I would straighten it briefly and go on with my day. Now if that happens, I spiral and have to check all the photo frames. I cry everyday because I know it's not rational, not at all, but if feels so comforting and "right" to do it. It's affecting my life, my kids and husband. My husband isn't supportive and doesn't understand at all, he just insults and calls me down - he says things like "oh sorry kids, your mom doesn't love us enough to not straighten pictures for an hour". He's very angry, and when he gets angry, I get stressed which leads to more cleaning and constant checking.

Please advise me on how to stop and how I can recover. I can't go to a therapist as I don't really have childcare for my kids and SSRIs are out, they give me a bad reaction.