u/Artistic_Software740

Im so close to relapsing

Around 4 weeks ago I decided to honor my EH as a student athlete who’s BMI was newly underweight. I felt weak at that times and barely functioning. It’s been very agonizing to get where I am at the moment. I built muscle and gained some fat but I could still considered skinny, just bulkier now. I felt so much better.

The problem is that my parents kept commenting that my current weight is okay now and I should stop gaining anymore. I made it clear that this would pass and etc, but when the comments were still up time to time I stated that I was genuinely hurt with those. They apologized for what they did but… I think that left me with being afraid of gaining any more weight now. I’m so close to spiral back into counting calories, tracking and restricting all over again. I don’t want that, but I don’t want to gain anymore weight either. I’m so stuck.

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u/Artistic_Software740 — 11 days ago

Dumb question, I know, but still – to summarize I’m a week in my all in recovery after a long period of binging-restricting cycle and AN. I looked in a mirror today and noticed just how puffy my face has gotten over the past week. It kinda demoralized me, even though I know it’s temporary. To those who’ve been through this, how was your experience like?

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u/Artistic_Software740 — 24 days ago