r/EatingDisorders

hi so i am 24 and i’ve struggled with an eating disorder for over a decade, starting as anorexia but then leading to bulimia. i started taking bisacodyl laxatives in 2021, just 2 or 3 every day but now here in 2026 i am taking upwards of 20 daily. so not great. anyways i have a doctors appointment this friday and i did not take any today as lately i have been in so much stomach pain from this it has made me throw up, chest tightness, heart racing etc. my body has become entirely dependent on these laxatives to go to the bathroom so i’m just wondering is getting over this going to just be a waiting game until my body figures out how to it naturally again or is there anything i can be doing / taking that isnt harmful that might help me out? or just any advice in general for this would be greatly appreciated because i am feeling quite scared of what’s to come haha. thank you :)

I am still slightly underweight but very close to what is considered normal and my eating habits are the healthiest they have ever been. But I can’t get over the panic of crossing the line or even if I know I can safely eat a sweat treat or a take out without overeating I can’t stop feeling guilty about it. I genuinely feel like being thin is the only thing I have going for me. I don’t think I am pretty or smart or good natured. And no amount of therapy and self help books was able to change this core belief that I have. Please share if that was something you have successfully dealt with.

Why do I constantly pee all the time and find it so hard to hold it I have been so close to peeing myself in public and wet my bed occasionally too it’s so awful

I’ve been on vyvanse for my ADD (which i have apparently?) and for my BED. It’s kinda like adderall. It’s helped so much with the food noise but i can’t eat. I just don’t. and whenever i don’t take it for the day i am stuffing my face the whole day and feel horrible. it’s so annoying it feels like i have to take this med every day to keep me sane and feeling good you know?

I eat normally in normal amounts but I feel the need to walk 15k-20k steps daily in order not to feel guilty

If I don't walk even if what ive eaten isn't enough to make me fat I still feel like fat is building up in my body and it makes me walk more

I sometimes walk until it hurts

People around me think it's rather odd but they laugh at it and recently no one has been commenting on it

But I think my mother thinks it's good moving around and shit whenever I tell her how many steps I've walked she'd look impressed

Basically, what the title says. When I purge, which is relatively new to my ED, I don't get rid of all of my food. Mainly because I try to stay discrete from my spouse. I just don't have the time. They know I'm bulimic so they watch me, so my purge windows are very limited.

I feel invalid. I don't empty my stomach. Sometimes, I only get rid of 1/4 cup of food. I don't feel sick enough.

I don't like my body. I don't wanna get naked and clean it. I don't know how to overcome this. It's been 12 days.

I am 21 F and I have been living with an eating disorder since 2020.

It started with bnlimia. Then it became an0rexia. Since then, it has felt like a cycle. Whenever I gain weight, I tend to go back to bnlimic habits.

One thing I have never talked about is how afraid I am of water. My brain keeps telling me it will make me heavier, so I avoid drinking it. For the past six years, my routine has stayed almost the same. I only eat dinner between 7:00 and 8:00 PM, usually vegetables or meat. No rice. No bread. No carbs.

This year, I started letting myself have “cheat days” every weekend. At first, I thought it was helping because I finally gave myself permission to eat foods I had been avoiding. But now it has reached a point where once I start eating, I feel like I cannot stop. I end up eating everything I see with no restrictions. Strangely, I have not noticed any significant weight gain, but mentally it feels like I am losing control every weekend.
I do not even know if these are cheat days anymore or if this is something else.

Has anyone else in recovery experienced something like this?

My (18M) sister (13) has an ED (anorexia) and she's been in and out of hospital for about a year, she got admitted to a psychiatric unit with other people round her age a few months ago. I haven't seen her in 6 months.

Both our parents are abusive and our childhood was very traumatic. I live an hour away now. We haven't ever been really close but I love her very much and looked after her a lot growing up so I feel some responsibility for her.

I have had an ED (bulimia) in the past and still struggle but I was able to deal with it without my parents ever knowing. I don't feel like my experience is in any way comparable to hers but I understand how it feels to look at yourself that way, or cope like that.

I've arranged with the ward to visit her next weekend as I'm in the area. To say I'm nervous would be an understatement, I'm not sure how to act. We have never been the hugging 'I love you' type. I want to take her something to show her I love her and I need her to know I'm here for her. She has told my other sister she doesn't want her visiting often but is also sometimes okay with it, I'm not sure of the reception I will get.

My question really is how do I handle this? How would people here with the same experience have wanted people to act?

I (20, M) don’t even know if she’s doing it on purpose of if she’s just unintentionally evil. She constantly makes comment about my eating habits. Some of the most hurtful/memorable ones are “what are you eating now?”. Or once I was going to make myself some food and she heard me in the kitchen and shouted from the other room, “what are you doing?” When I told her I was going to make myself some chicken nuggets she said “don’t eat them all in one day.” I put everything back and went in my room. She’ll do this then turn around and act concerned when she notices that im losing weight. I know she has body image issues but i hate how she makes it my problem. She always pity begs with making comments about herself like “im about to hurt myself” before binging in front of me. It’s sickening. I’ve tried to talk to her about it but she gets offended when I tell her that what she says hurts my feelings. Is there anything I can do to get her to stop? Im saving up money to move out asap, I don’t know what else to do.

I have binge eating disorder and I'm wondering if I'll be okay if I just ate a whole thing of week old, unrefrigerated garlic knots from Domino's? I binge ate them like I didn't even care they were a week old. And I feel bad but I just want to make sure I'm okay.

Hey, so as caption states I’m looking for any and all advice, honestly. I don’t have the resources yet for a therapist and figured the community might be nice to reach out to, so here goes.

I need any and all strategies you have for being *okay* with the weight gain of recovery. I have not been at a healthy weight since 2023, and as of this year I’ve only been able to recover.
The standard things happened, and I hate to say it, but all those “you look great!” compliments got to my head, QUICK.
I started transitioning, and with that, my weight distribution shows off my clearly poor (but there!!) daily diet.

While I’m working to improve those habits that trace me back to fast food and high processed items, I truly do not know how to be okay with my body re-using the space it once confidently took up. I love where I’m going physically- I’ve never smiled at myself until like a month ago.

All the while, I am still inwardly struggling to justify or show love for the recovery aspect of what I’m going through..any tips, big or infinitesimally small, are deeply appreciated.

Also, yes, I know this is the perfect post for sarcasm..but refrain, if you would, and thank you for your time.

If this isn't the right place to post this can you PLEASE help me find a different place. Instead of just deleting this or ignoring it. Cause I actually want advice/help...

I'm so sorry if this is the wrong reddit but I really just. it's so hard to eat. If I have disordered eating it's really mild so I feel like so intrusive posting here but there's not like a "mild disorder-not-disorder" subreddit 😭

I've started to feel stressed every time I think about eating. every day I wake up and I get so frustrated cause it feels like there's nothing to eat. even food I like sometimes makes me want to gag especially in the morning. I skip meals a lot because of this and I can tell by the way my pants fit I've lost a little bit of weight, which isn't good at my size/height. I was at a healthy weight before lol

it's too hard to make myself eat. I have issues even buying food because I feel guilty spending money on it (kinda unrelated) and every easy food that gets recommended, like "oh just nibble on some trail mix through the day! eat oatmeal in the morning!" etc is so gross to me OR I like it but it makes me feel queasy. I feel like I never have the right kinds of foods in the house or it's too overwhelming to cook and think of food to make and I'm just so sick of having to eat every day

I can't just keep making myself eat things I don't like because of this because it's not just a "oh not my favorite" it just makes me so grossed out I can't do it

16 (F), I’ve had a bad relationship with food for at least 3 years. I never did anything insane it was mainly thoughts, I would try restricting then end up binging and that would repeat over and over making me maintain my weight, I never told anyone because it’s embarrassing I couldn’t even diet. but about two months ago i started restricting more and doing a lot more actions and I started getting dedicated, but one day I binged and and learned how to purge via vomit, since then I slowly started doing it more. I don’t even think about my body now, just how I cant eat without the overwhelming need to vomit. I feel like I cant eat without vomiting, in just 4 weeks it went from 1-2 times a weeks to a few times a day. yesterday I managed to not vomit all day because I tried really hard. but before I slept I purposely ate cereal to vomit, my day didn’t feel complete without it, I feel so gross if I don’t get rid of at least some of the food.

I only learned to purge a month ago, so i feel like i’m not sick enough. I haven’t lost any weight that i can tell. I was thinking waiting another month before telling my therapist because I don’t know if i’m ready yet or sick enough.

Hi all. I am trying to recover from bulimia and it’s really, really difficult. I’ve been purge free via >!vomiting!< for a little bit but still restricting and over exercising after it happens. And honestly the binging has been happening a lot because I’m still in the cycle, but I’m also freaking out because I don’t have the safety net of >!vomiting!< anymore.

What is difficult is I know that restriction informs the binging, and I shouldn’t restrict the next day, but honestly my appetite is shot…. So when I see people say not to restrict, I roll my eyes, because most times I am genuinely uncomfortable and I don’t get hungry until later. But by the time I do eat, I give in and binge at night.

What do you after a binge to stop the binging again? Especially if your appetite is gone? I skip breakfast and have a light lunch after a binge (which honestly has been all week) but then I do it all over again at night when I get home from work and suddenly out of nowhere become incredibly famished.

Please, I need help

Recovery can be so daunting when we think about it. Not only do many of feel unready to recover or are scared of the changes and fight that recovery takes, but we often think we arent worth it. Sometimes we cant see the painting because we’re in the frame. This is understandable, its the unknown in some ways and the opposite of how we ave become accustomed to living our lives. Not everyone is unready, but if you feel you aren’t thats valid. Often our thoughts and feelings on things like recovery or quasi can shift and change from day to day, or even hour to hour. Its not just going to be one solid emotions the entire time. Its a lot of emotions, growth, and learning.

Sometimes we need to be able to look at it like an outsider but that can be realy difficult to do, especially with our self bias. Our critical thinking abiities can also be affected and ED likes to keep us wearing blinders, we’re badicaly horses in jousting. Its hard to know what to reflect on as well to try to see things differently and can also deter some people from recovery or prolong the time between.

I have some questions that can help you see things from a different perspective. These are made and worded to make you think, and not just right after reading it. Take the time to think them over, try a few days and see how your thoughts and emotions can change your answer as you think more, this is normal. It’s also normal for it to go from a surface area response to a more in depth personal answer. If you journal, these may make good prompts for you to explore. Having a conversation with someone and sharing answers can also be helpful.

Now, let’s do a little reflection:

How has your life changed from before your ED to now?
What do your friendships look like? How have they changed if they did? Do you notice a difference in how your friends act and respond since?
How is your relationships with family? Are they a support system for you or are you doing it without family? How have the dynamics changed since your ED started? (Apologize for those of us who dont have or have lost their families or gone no contact)
If presented with a surprise meal, how would you react? How would you have reacted previously before your ED?
How much time in a day does your ED affect you? Physically, mentally, emotionally, etc?
What does your body look like to you now? How would you describe your relationship with your body currently? What is your body goal? How was your pre ED relationships like with your body? Were you conscious of your body before your ED started?
How much do you channel into your ED instead of communicating, facing, realizing, and similar things instead of using ED to cope?
How would you feel if your loved one was who was engaging i behaviors and struggling with the addiction eating disorders create? How would you approach them about your concerns? What would it be like watching your loved one getting sicker and sicker from their ED? Would you want them to get help and try to recover? How would you support them?

Now onto recovery reflection:
How do you feel about being made to recover/weight restore/treatment? How would you feel if this was your friend in your shoes in this scenario? What would be your opinion on it?
If you were allowed to continue your ED behavoirs, at what point do you think you would be wanting to recover? Do you ever want to recover?
Do you think it would be less scary to recover on your own terms?
How do you imagine coming to recovery in your own time, given the freedom to?
How much more of your time and life are you willing to part with to get sik? Is there a goal you want to reach before you want recovery? Or a “okay, i’m done with this after __”? “I got to _ now i can”? “I’m finally sick enough to deserve treatment”?
How do you feel about this sentence: All i want to do is get sicker and i never want to recover.
What does recovery mean to you? What would be your ideal experience? What are your fantasies about it? What are the nightmares? What would you get out of it? Do you believe you ever can recover?
Why do you feel like you shouldn’t recover now, even if its not your choice?
Have you considered that the wanting to recover by your choice is the ED’s way of saying “don’t get healthy, don’t leave me”

Hello to you all, I am unfamiliar with this sub and generally have never posted on Reddit before, but I need help. English is not my first language, so bear with me please.

The situation is: I (teenM), my best friend (teenF) and her mother went out for fun, came back and her mum brought certain foods to treat me to (i.e. butter cookies). I myself did not end up eating. I didn't have a specific reason other than wanting to eat at home instead.

I also believe it's relevant to add that I am an overweight person and largely unamused by certain beauty standards, which is to say, I don't tend to look anywhere near conventionally (or "thin") attractive, therefore I am not viable "competition" for her disorder.

Back to the situation: She ended up eating the cookies and wanting to vomit, but she couldn't do so with me in the house. She asked me to leave (which she considered "falling extremely low" for her) and I refused. Or more so, stalled on contacting my ride home. She offered to have her mum drive me home, I said no and we went back and forth for a while. I wouldn't call it a fight, but I know I exhausted her mentally. I did eventually call my mum and go home but she had said it was too late to complete her ritual (As in, she had already digested the food) and she did decide to stay "mad" at me for ruining her weekend plans (Going out with friends, to the beach and staying over at her boyfriend's about 5 days later). She also insinuated that she may start lying to me about feeling better to keep me off her ("I should've never opened my mouth and told you about this")

I know that I did not handle the situation with grace but I am not knowledgeable at all on eating disorders or bulimia specifically and was forced to make a split second decision on how to deal with it. Her mother is aware and has not gotten her professional help, which is, to an extent, unavailable for people that are not in danger of death in the near future (to put it bluntly) and extremely stigmatized. We are both teenagers and it's already hard to deal with one's own mental health, so supporting a person who is going through this, especially when you lack the power to actually access professional help for others, feels impossible. I do not believe she would follow through with lying to me about it, but it does worry me. I do not want her to push me out and I love her dearly.

I am open to criticism (though please try to phrase it in a firstly honest and secondly kind way) and I am in dire need of direction on how to go about this. I would specifically like advice on how to deal with reassurance seeking, how to deal with a similar situation in the future and whether leaving it alone would ever be a good idea. One last thing, please let me note if this post is triggering or inappropriate for this sub in some way

TLDR: I made my bulimic friend skip a vomiting ritual and I am conflicted about the impact of my actions - in need of advice on how to deal with it moving forward

Hey, haven’t posted here but have found myself really struggling recently. I literally cannot enjoy things in moderation. I know that sounds dramatic, but it is 100% the truth. I’ll use today as an example. I was eating clean all week, and then for some reason I had the overwhelming urge to have something sweet. I ate one, and next thing I know I ate the whole container, ice cream, and half a container of Oreos. It is all or nothing for me, and I try to tell myself, “I can binge only if I eat healthy for the next two weeks” but I never make it that long. I’m always thinking about the next treat I can have, but the problem is, once I start, I literally cannot stop till I feel like I’m going to throw up. It’s concussing my thinking and my health. Is this a common behavior for people with binge eating disorders, or am I being dramatic here.

Dietician set a weekly weight gain goal for me. However, it is strict & precise. I will not share numbers. I am recovery from atypical ana, lower end of the normal weight range.

He set a weekly weight gain “rate” which most would consider a modest rate. Think of a “lean bulk”. If I exceed this rate, I risk unnecessary fat gain. This requires me to really track macros to ensure I am as close as possible to the targeted energy surplus. He doesn’t want me to track, but it feels like I have no choice

This still feels restrictive. I can’t take the fucking pressure. It’s like I’m now hyper fixated on gaining a specific amount of weight per week to adhere to societal expectations and body image standards.

I’m on vacation now and it feels like torture. It’s like good luck actually enjoying.

Hello everyone. Today, one of the worst situations in my life happened. I have been suffering from nervous bulimia for 8 months now, and today my family found out about it. My family is religious and I would say quite large (I have 4 older brothers, I am the youngest child in the family). My family is very skeptical about psychotherapy and, in principle, about psychological problems. Every time I tried to share my inner experiences, they began to shame me and say that I have no reason for the development of a depressive state and that I am playing the victim. Talking about bulimia was just really scary. Today the truth came out when my mother went to the toilet and saw the remains of food. And of course, they immediately began to interrogate me. I thought that there was nothing to lose, I told everything as it was. In the end, the horror began. First, my mother started yelling at me, saying that it was terrible for my health and my stomach (I don’t want to say anything here, she absolutely rights). Then my older brother joined in and also started yelling at me, but this time about me being a liar and betraying everyone's trust. There wasn't even the slightest note of compassion in his words, only about what a scumbag I was for deceiving everyone all this time and how disgusting it was for him to talk to me now. I understand that lying is bad, but I was just really scared to talk about it. It all came down to a really big fight, my brothers said many times that I was behaving disgustingly and how disappointed they were in me... Mom agrees with them (Dad wasn't home at the time, but he will 100% take their side). They took my phone away, so I'm writing from my laptop. I was accused of betraying their trust, but I was just scared, because if I had told them about it voluntarily, they would have severely bullied me (which is basically what happened and it confirmed my fears). Now almost no one is with me My family wants to talk to me, or even see me, but they think I'm a lying scumbag. I understand that my actions were destructive, but do I really not deserve at least a drop of sympathy? Why can't I get even a drop of sympathy from my own family? They only yell and accuse me of being stupid for getting such a disease. And bulimia really torments me. At times, I simply lose control and binge, after which I'm overcome with terrible panic. It's terrible. I really want to eat well, but I constantly think about food. I've reached a point where nothing brings me joy except food, and it's terrible. I feel guilty, but I feel like I was treated rather cruelly. (Sorry, English isn't my main language, so there may be errors in the text.)