Ok, for starters we are coworkers and there’s an 18 year age gap. I’ve known him for a while but only recently developed these feelings as we’ve been talking and engaging with each other a lot more over the past month or so. At first I kind of wrote him off as just another man hitting on me but the more I’ve gotten to know him I’ve grown to really like him… a lot.
I hate it at the same time though. I’ve never really crushed this hard before as an adult. I don’t believe I’ve had a crush on ANYONE since junior high, maybe. I’m finding myself questioning every encounter and conversation and it’s annoying me.
We’ve just recently started to communicate via text and more often than not I get left on “read”. For days. Sometimes he calls but it’s not very consistent either and it leaves me feeling very silly, embarrassed, too available, and … needy. Why do I NEED this man to communicate with me so much?
I think what’s bothering me is the fact that when we are at work, there’s no need for me to try to decode anything. His speech, body language, etc all indicates that he’s into me just as much as I’m into him. He jokes with me, compliments me, he even looks for ways to get close and touch me even if it’s just a graze on the arm. I’ve also noticed that he uses the term “we” frequently. “We should go here”, “we’ll do this”
So why am I overthinking this? I am taking into account that he just may not be a fan of texting or the phone in general but I’ve just never dealt with a situation like this. It’s confusing. Or am I just confusing myself? I would love to just be upfront and honest with him about my attraction towards him but I’m quite intimidated. I also think that I make it quite known already anyway. Ughhhh.