Is it a good time to move out? I’ve reached my limit
Husband (35) and me (31) have been married for almost 4 years now and have a 20-month-old. There have been numerous issues at home since we live in joint family mainly from his mother’s and a divorced sister’s side. Things have gone so bad now that it is hard to live there, I feel like I’m constantly under surveillance as my SIL reports about everything to her mother (she’s currently abroad with her daughters) and sisters and makes it a point to defame me by pointing out only those things that make me look bad. Apart from that, there are a lot of managerial issues at home where my SIL would try to dominate the house help. She has also bad mouth about me in front of their extended relatives leading to them being hostile towards me. Apart from that, my MIL, knowing well ab her daughter’s nature, still came onto me the other day that why am I not including SIL in my daily dealings etc. They way she said was very hurtful and I removed myself from the situation which lead me having to apologise to her as per my husband’s request because it was considered being disrespectful towards an elder even though I was just so hurt in the moment that I was shaking from being hurt and was about to cry badly and decided to excuse myself. Anyways, I came to my parents house for a few days and told them about everything that has been going on for the first time in 4 years, which lead them to having a reaction as well. They called my husband in and talked to him who informed them that he knows about his family’s behaviour and that I should keep my relationship good with him etc etc. My issue is that, I’m so drained in the environment (and taking care of my toddler the whole day too) that I barely have energy left to work on my relationship itself (same is the case with my husband but he won’t admit). Anyways, my parents are now asking me to make my relationship better with my husband and try to ‘ignore’ the rest of the things. My husband has informed them that he is planning to move out (something that’s long overdue) to another place while previously trying to move to the other portion of the house and that not working out and that he is doing at the expense of making his own parents upset and that he will have to take a lot of financial burden. My parents are trying to convince me now that I should wait for a bit and have sabr and when the other portion is ready, we can move there as it will be easier for my husband too and that I should make things work till then. The problem is, I have been making things work for a while now and I’ve told them things only after reaching my limit. However, this is something that they don’t really understand. Do you guys think things can work out for a bit or we should move out immediately?