Co-parenting after betrayal
I learned a few weeks ago my husband of 20yrs had an AP on/off our entire marriage. I actually think he probably has more now I have more details. We have a teenage child.
He has moved out but has been messaging our teen nightly. Our child has responded back minimally and often find excuses to end talking to him.
I’ve gone no-contact as between his long term betrayal, admitting to manipulating people and history of gaslighting, I need the space.
Our teen has expressed to me that it feels like the dad is trying to manipulate them.
My question is- do I step in and request a bit of space on behalf of our child? Our teen is seeing a therapist, feels supported, speaks to me daily about the various feelings regarding all of this. I have encouraged contact, reiterated that their relationship can look different from mine and his.
My concern is if he is manipulating, I don’t want to give him any extra attention. A piece of me also thinks he will actually get bored trying to engage our child- he’s never been highly involved.
I don’t want it to look like I’m keeping her from him (to courts or anything if it comes to that). If he is actually being genuine, I’d like to give him a good position to be in to actually have a decent relationship with her.
Equally I now do not trust anything that comes out of his mouth…
Thoughts? Thanks loads- this community has been a life saver!