My girlfriend is suicidal and i don’t know what to do anymore.
My girlfriend keeps having these episodes and i don’t know what to do anymore. I lost two people in one year last year and it has destroyed me so much, i can’t afford to lose her. My girlfriend has helped me so much in ways she doesn’t know. Whenever we argue, she feels bad and apologizes over and over even if it wasn’t her fault. She takes care of me and loves me unconditionally. I’ve never been in a relationship where someone cares for me and treats me the way she does. I try to be there for her as much as i can and i keep trying to get her help, she says she doesn’t know where to start and her main concern is getting sent away. She tries to be strong for me but she says it’s just getting worse and she wants to be honest with me. Last night, she said she had things to do and she wouldn’t tell me until i got really upset about it because i know shes trying to do something stupid, which she was. She was writing letters for loved ones just “incase” something happens. What if that “incase” is tonight, tomorrow, the next day, this week, next week? I go to sleep almost every night hoping she doesn’t do anything stupid to herself. I don’t know how much more i can handle because she’s been like this for awhile. She says i should leave because it isn’t fair for me to have to have a sad girlfriend, but i honestly do not want to break up with her because i believe she’s going to get better and she’s going to get over it and if the roles were switched she would help me and be there for me as much as she could. I want to text her mom and tell her, but she’s going to be upset if i do that because she doesn’t want her mom to worry about her. I’m running out of options and i will be honest, this is exhausting and even a lot for me. I promised that her mental health isn’t ever going to be much for me because you’re supposed to stick with your partner during their up and downs, but i really don’t know what to do anymore. Any advice?