AITA for telling my mom I am not going to put up with racism against my kid the way she did.
I will try to make a long story short.
My mom is white and my dad is black. They split when I was little. While I am not white passing, I am not obviously read as black either unless my natural hair is worn down. I would say I am pretty racially ambiguous. My mom has several racist people on her side of the family. Some who just make light comments all the way to an uncle who uses the n-word. My mom never protected me or my brothers from these comments growing up.
Fast forward to present day. I am now 30 and expecting my first baby. My partner is black, meaning our baby boy will be majority black and probably black presenting. I haven't been back to visit family in years and was talking to my mom recently about going back home after the baby is born to introduce them to my partner and the baby. I mentioned if anyone makes any racist comments about my son or my partner, we are leaving. Full stop out of there because I am not making them put up with what we had to put up with. My mom was deeply hurt at that because she said I was saying she was a bad mom for not protecting us from those family members. I told her I wasn't saying that, but I think the right move would have been to stand up for us and that is what I am planning on doing with my son. She ended up in tears saying "Well I guess I am just the worst mother in the world."
Soooo, aita?
Edit: As to why even go, not everyone on my mom's side is like this. Just a few in a large family. My great grandma had 9 kids and one of them (a great aunt of mine, her husband, and their kids/spouses) are particularly bad, as is an uncle who married my mom's sister.
They do a big family Christmas and everyone attends. I would like to go to introduce my partner and son to my family. Additionally, we live abroad in a small living space. so having family come visit us isn't super feasible