I’m scared I lost respect for my friend
I’m a tad drunk right now and maybe shouldn’t be posting this because I’m afraid she’ll see it, but I’ve debated making this post for a while now. Ive been friends with this girl for nearly a decade at this point and we have quite the history together. We’ve graduated college now but lately the way she behaves really rubs me the wrong way. It’s like I’m friends with someone that’s still in high school. The issue is, she hasnt done anything specifically bad to me, it’s just her behavior in general/attitude towards certain things. She gives me “the ick” constantly and I feel like she lacks emotional depth or the ability to have good empathy. Some examples:
She read a memoir about Vietnam veteran with PTSD and said she didn’t enjoy it because she felt like he needed to just “get over it”
She’s made jokes about her sister in law potentially having infertility issues. I just don’t think this is something that’s funny/should be made into a joke.
She almost brought cigarettes to try and get everyone to smoke on MY birthday when she knows I have asthma and can’t be around smoke like that. I think this was just a bad lapse in judgment but it really pissed me off and made me feel like she doesn’t know me at all.
She’s a little too obsessed/invested in the lives of people we went to high school with and always wants to gossip about them when I truly couldn’t give less of a fuck about what those people are doing.
She’s simply very judgemental of the way other people live their lives, especially people who get married young or choose to have children, like she’s above them or smarter than them for not doing that. I get the basic idea of where she’s coming from but she often comes off so immature about it. Truly I think it comes from jealousy.
Anyway, that’s my rant. I still love this girl and she’s fun to be around. She’s a good friend to party with, get drinks with, etc. But when it comes to anything serious, she continually lets me down and comes off as immature to me. I don’t want to ruin our friendship and the history I have with her, but potentially distance myself. I appreciate any thoughts/opinions, I feel like I really need an outsiders perspective on this. I can also provide more examples of what’s caused me to drift from her if needed (there’s plenty more). Sorry this is long.